Is That a Bet?
by Professor Sexymore
Summary: Light and L have been married for five years with their three adopted children. They are both aware of who does the most work around the house, so why is L making such a ridiculous bet? And how will it turn out? Family fic with L, Light, Near, Mello, and Matt. AU.
1. The Bet

**My first family fic~ I've been meaning to write this for a while now, but I was too lazy to do it. L, Light, Matt, Mello and Near are just so much fun to write about. :D Especially when Mello, Matt, and Near are small children~ **

**So yeah. This is what I've been up to the past two days. I basically wrote whatever came to mind, so I might have to a do a lot of editing later. Oh well, I just wanted to get it done.**

**Well, enjoy~**

* * *

><p>"I would have never thought that you two of all people…"<p>

Soichiro stood in front of the engaged couple, shaking his head. He had been preparing for this for months, but even though today was the big day, he still couldn't accept it.

A young man with a tan complexion laughed, his chestnut hair bouncing as his body shook lightly. "Come on, Dad. It's not that hard to believe after all this time, is it?"

He reached down and grabbed the pale hand of his fiancé, who turned and looked warmly at him through raven locks, smiling a small smile.

"I suppose not, Light." his father sighed. "You and L are certain you're making the right decision, right?"

"Mr. Yagami, this question has become quite redundant. I was certain I wanted to marry Light the moment I proposed to him, and I assume he was the same considering he accepted."

Light nodded and squeezed L's spidery hand tightly, their engagement rings glinting in the sunlight. They were each dressed in neatly pressed black tuxedos as they stood in front of the church, awaiting the arrival of the rest of Light's family. (Since L's only family was Watari)

Everyone was celebrating their wedding, to Light's relief. The only one who still seemed slightly disturbed about his homosexuality was his father who constantly questioned his relationship.

His mother accepted it, but didn't seem that pleased. She probably expected her "perfect son" to choose a more sophisticated partner, but L could be nice-looking when he was forced to. In fact, Light had spent a whole hour fixing L's hair, which was neatly brushed out and straightened, looking almost silky. Light marveled the work he did on L, smirking inwardly as he remembered the fight he had to go through to get L to agree.

Light looked just as good as L, of course. He had spent even longer on his hair than usual, making sure he looked perfect for their big day. Since Light was naturally attractive, it wasn't that hard to do. Not that L wasn't either.

Light had worried how his little sister would handle her older brother being a homosexual and worried that she wouldn't know how to take it. Sayu was quite accepting, however. In fact, she liked L a lot and always tried to start conversations with him. Unfortunately, L being as socially awkward as he was, wasn't really big on conversations and normally ruined the topic by saying some genius remark and ultimately confusing the not-so-bright Sayu.

Watari had seemed wary, but didn't really have much of a choice considering how stubborn L was. He had put up with a lot of his adopted son's quirks, so him marrying Light wasn't anything he was shocked about.

To name all of the family member's opinions would take a while, so we'll just skip over that. However, Misa's opinion of the whole thing shocked even Light. Sure, the model was very disappointed at first and was in strict denial. But Misa was quite the romantist and couldn't hate L and Light's relationship for too long. She had even helped plan the wedding. Speaking of Misa…

"L-kun! Light-kun!" The duo turned their heads towards young blonde woman who was running towards them. She was wearing a strapless black dress that had the Gothic loita-look to it, and she was wearing her hair down instead of in the pigtails. Around her neck she wore a small black cross choker. A very simple look considering what she usually wore.

"Yes, Misa?" Light replied, flashing a smile. Even Misa's annoying peppiness couldn't dull his mood today.

Misa bounced a little. "The entire wedding party has arrived, come in so we can start~"

"Did you hear that, L?" Light asked eagerly, smiling as he gave his soon-to-be husband a sideways glance.

L nodded, his black orbs that were normally dull swirling in excitement. "Yes indeed, Light. Shall we go?"

Light leaned in to his fiancé and kissed him softly. "Ready when you are."

L and Light joined the rest of the wedding inside. Neither of them were Christian, but they were pressed by Light's religious parents who wanted them to have their wedding in a church. Light decided it didn't really matter, however. They could get married in the middle of the street for all he cared, as long as he married L.

Cheers rang out as they entered the auditorium as people stood up and clapped. Light blushed while L just raked his gaze over them blankly, his mouth being tugged into a small smile. L turned Light towards him and gave him a soft kiss on the lips.

"Next time we do that, we will be married." L said, his face serious. "Are you still sure you are ready to make this commitment?"

Light rolled his eyes. "Of course, L. I would've declined your proposal if I thought otherwise. Is it really that hard to believe that I love you?"

L scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I guess I never thought I would ever have a chance like this, considering what my occupation is…"

"Please, you're amazing. Anyone would be lucky to have you." Light reassured cheesily, which caused L's pale face to turn a light pink. Light was the only one who could make him show emotions so effortlessly.

"Light, I have to walk you down the aisle…" his father stated grumpily behind him.

Light turned to his unenthusiastic father and grinned. "Okay."

Light brushed his hand across L's as he walked towards the end of the church, murmuring, "See you soon." to the other as he walked passed.

L gave Light a small nod before taking his place beneath the alter, hunched over and hands shoved in his dress pant's pockets.

Light followed his father out of the auditorium, hardly able to contain his excitement. His father seemed quite the opposite as he massaged his temple, his brow furrowed.

He frowned. "Dad, can't you at least try to be happy? This is a very important day for me."

"…I just thought you would turn out differently, son." he muttered. "Misa was such a nice girl. What went wrong?"

"Misa and I aren't compatible for each other. She's a great friend, but nothing more."

"But L of all people-"

Light gave his father a glare. "_Dad_. Don't talk bad about L in front of me." After they both stared intensely into each other's eyes for a few moments, Light sighed. "I just hope one day you'll be able to accept us."

Soichiro let out a sigh as well. "Light, if I didn't accept you and L, do you really think I would let you two get married? I know how close you two are, I just still can't believe it."

Light smiled. To him, that was acceptance. "Thanks, Dad."

A quiet hush fell on the church's auditorium as the orchestra began to play the wedding theme. L and Light didn't have any groomsmen, considering they both didn't have very close friends, so they skipped straight to the wedding.

A girl from Whammy's House had been brought to play the role of flower girl since neither man had any young children in their family. Light observed her curiously, eyeing her blonde curls and light pink dress. She was cute, Light decided. Certainly fit to play such a role. The young girl entered the auditorium on cue confidently, tossing out a handful of pink petals as she entered.

After a few minutes, the girl made it to the end, L giving her a small pat on the head as she smiled up at him. Now it was the brunette's turn to enter. Light hooked arms with his hesitant father and pushed through the auditorium doors.

Light beamed at L, who stood hunched over, a bored look on his face. His face lit up as he saw Light enter, however, and quickly made an attempt to straighten his posture, which failed. Light chuckled lightly as he was led down the aisle.

Finally after what seemed like ages, he was reunited with his lover, who gave him a small smile as he took his hand. They turned towards the preacher who looked down at them with a curious look before reading the vows.

After about a minute of the preacher talking, L brought up his index finger to nibble at the nail uninterestedly. Light gave him a tight squeeze of his hand and soft glare when the raven gave him a questioning look. The insomniac rolled his eyes before withdrawing his finger and bringing his bored stare back to the preacher.

Light zoned off a bit himself, and almost jumped as he heard a small boy walk up behind him. L and Light turned around at the same time, facing a small boy from Whammy's house. He was wearing a nice, black suit and had a full head of brown hair. His eyes were warm as he looked up at the soon-to-be couple, holding a pillow out with his pale hands. Two rings laid on top. Their weddings rings.

Light shook his head slightly as he recalled the preacher's words and picked up L's wedding ring. L did the same with Light's, his dark orbs sparking with excitement as they made eye contact. The preacher cleared his throat.

"Okay, Light. Repeat after me. I, Light Yagami, take you, L Lawliet, to be my partner…"

Light repeated those words in as he stared into L's dark eyes.

"Loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not know yet…"

Light echoed the sentence, noting the pink tint of embarrassment that was starting to become apparent on L's cheeks.

"I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the man you will become, and falling in love a little more every day."

L's blush deepened as Light repeated the vows to him.

"I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may bring us."

Light finished the vows with a small smile and a light blush on his cheeks. They didn't compliment each other like that often, so it was sort of embarrassing for both of them.

The brunette then took L's pale hand, which was frozen in midair, and slid the wedding ring on his ring finger. Light smiled warmly before L had to say his vows.

L didn't like speaking in public, and today wasn't any different. L's voice was a low mumble that shook slightly as he repeated the vows, but to him it didn't really matter if the rest of the wedding party didn't hear. Light heard and that's all that mattered. The raven slid the ring on Light's finger in that awkward way he does things, his hand resting on Light's slightly before he pulled away.

The preacher proceeded to say something else, but Light didn't catch any of his words. The only words that stood out was, "You may now kiss the groom."

L reached out and grabbed Light's chin and pulled it towards him as he crushed his lips into the brunette's. Cheers echoed throughout the room, but no cheer could be louder than the loud squeal of approval Misa gave out. They pulled away a few moments later, remembering they were supposed to save anything intimate for later.

As they turned, they were greeted by Misa. "So, you two are married now. What should I call you guys? L Yagami, or Light Lawliet?" she giggled.

"Light and L Lawliet. I am the husband in this relationship." L stated proudly.

Light gave him a glare. "I am not your bride."

"Tonight you will be." L said playfully in that monotone of his before wrapping his arms around Light's waist and resting his head on his shoulder.

Light blushed and quickly looked around for his family which caused Misa to laugh. "Please, Light-kun~ Every adult knows what newlyweds do on their honeymoon."

"But it embarrasses me," Light protested. "I don't want my entire family to know L and I have… sexual relations."

"There's no need to be shy, Light." L said before planting a soft kiss on his neck.

Light drew in a sharp intake of breath. "L, _not here_." he scolded and pushed L off his back.

L smirked, pulling away. "As you wish, Mrs. Lawliet."

Light gave him another glare before Misa clapped her hands together loudly. "No arguing on our wedding day, I won't let it happen! Now, let's go cut the wedding cake~"

L's eyes lit up at this idea before flashing mischievously. "Yes, Light. Remember, we have to feed the cake to each other like other couples do."

The brunette flinched, not liking the idea of getting crumbs and icing all over his hands. But it was his wedding day, and he couldn't say that shoving a piece of cake in L's face didn't sound fun.

The cake was half strawberry and half vanilla respectively, a figure of L standing on top of the strawberry side and a figure of Light standing on the vanilla side. Light cut a slice out of the strawberry side while L cut a vanilla piece. They turned towards each other, cake in their grasps.

"Ready, Lii-mmph-" Light shoved the cake in L's open mouth, smearing the white icing on his porcelain skin and causing Light to laugh.

L smirked as he chewed. "Very mature, Light." he mumbled through the cake before shoving his own slice in the brunette's mouth, which was open as he laughed at L.

Light's eyes narrowed as he tried his best to ignore the smeared icing on his own face. "Touché."

Misa groaned quietly. "Look at you two, you have icing all over your faces."

L's tongue darted out to lick off the icing he could reach, giving the blonde a blank look. Misa said something about L using manners before walking off to find one of her friends she had brought with her.

Light shook his head at L and grabbed a nearby napkin and wiped the icing on his face off neatly. After the raven stopped trying to reach unreachable patches of icing with his tongue, Light passed him a napkin.

"Misa has a point, you know." Light pointed out as L wiped his face clean.

"Meaningless, Light. Misa can say whatever she likes, it will not change my actions."

"Would you change if I told you to?" Light asked, crossing his arms.

L smirked. "No need to be so cross over something foolish. Besides, you like it when I eat a little messily. You have told me before."

Light blushed and rubbed the back of his neck, looking down. "Not in public…"

"So, you guys finally tied the knot."

Light turned around, coming face-to-face with friend and ex-girlfriend Kiyomi Takada. He gaped, before closing his mouth. "Who invited you? Not to be rude or anything… But I don't remember sending you an invitation."

"Me!" A bubbly blonde jumped out behind the raven female, grinning. "I knew you guys were friends, so I didn't see an issue."

"Misa. You were supposed to okay every guest with L and I." Light groaned. "Not that Kiyomi being here is a problem, but…"

"Loosen up, Light. It's your wedding day!" Misa exclaimed, grabbing his arm and pulling on it. "C'mon, let's go have some fun! You too, L. You never seem to do anything exciting."

"Oh, I could argue that…" Light sang under his breath.

L gave Light a warning glance before looking at the blonde blankly. "It goes against my personality to do such things."

"Today's different. You just got married." Misa stated for the third time. She really is a romantist, isn't she? "And if Light doesn't make sure you have a good time, then me being one of your friends, I will."

L blinked. "If Light does not wish to, then I do not either."

"Yeah, Misa… Today's a great day, but L and I aren't the kind of people that party." Light agreed. "But if you want to, go ahead. We aren't standing in your way."

Misa crossed her arms and pouted, a strand of blonde hair falling in the middle her face. "You guys are no fun. What kind of couple doesn't party a little on their wedding day?"

L dug his finger into the wedding cake, scooping up the white icing. "We're saving the party for after." L replied as he licked the icing off.

"_L_. Not in public." Light warned again.

Misa giggled, holding a small hand in front of her red lips shyly. "Wow, L. I didn't know you could be so funny."

"It's rare that I let it slide, but I can have a dry sense of humor." L said, his face amusingly serious.

"And I'm well aware of it." Light sighed.

Kiyomi chuckled. "Well, you guys are an interesting couple. I hope you guys are happy together, Light can be a handful sometimes."

Misa giggled. "Got that right. He was always so stubborn when we dated. He never wanted to go out because of his studies."

Of course, that's not why Light didn't go out with her. He didn't go out with her because she was one of the most annoying creatures on the planet if you were with her for too long. But Light didn't want to cause any arguments on such a beautiful day, so he kept his mouth shut.

"But I am just as stubborn, if not more. I know how to handle him." L stated.

"Handle me?" Light repeated, raising an eyebrow. "Nobody 'handles me'."

"No need to tell lies, Light. I am one of the only people who knows how to deal with you, and you know it."

Light rolled his eyes. "Remind me again why I just married you?"

"No need to get hurtful." L pouted. He brought a finger up to his mouth thoughtfully. "You know, we've only gotten drunk together once…"

Light gave him a surprised glance. "Are you saying you want to party, L?"

"I suppose it would not hurt anything." L replied, shrugging.

Misa jumped a little. "That's the spirit!" she cheered. "Come on, Light. You wouldn't deny your husband anything, would you?"

"Oh, I sure as hell would." Light said and pinched the bridge of his nose. "But I suppose we can loosen up a bit. Just this once, considering the occasion."

Kiyomi chuckled, already starting up her camera. After college, the raven had become a skilled photographer. And Light didn't put it past her to take pictures for blackmail or teasing. "This could get interesting." she smiled evilly.

"No pictures involving nudity." Light warned the photographer, eyeing her digital camera.

Kiyomi smirked. "I'm not promising anything."

"If you do capture such photos, I would like a copy." L added in.

Of course. His pervert of a husband had to say something like that.

"L, don't encourage this."

"I do not see what the issue is. This is a just an innocent celebration." L brought his finger up to his lips as he looked at Light. "I am sure you have done worse in your teen years. Like that one party…"

"L." Light warned his husband for the third time. "_Never_ again."

L smirked. "Funny, that was the party we met at…"

"Yeah. We hated each other at first." Light said, a nostalgic look reflecting in his eyes.

L nodded in agreement. "We had some interesting arguments."

Misa tapped her foot impatiently. "Talk about your past some other time! Let's go have fun!"

"Indeed. Let us go, Light." He smirked again, grabbing his husband's arm.

Light stumbled after L, Misa, and Kiyomi unenthusiastically as he was pulled. "Alright… But don't let me do anything too crazy. You know how I get when I'm drunk."

L looked back at Light over his shoulder innocently. "No promises."

* * *

><p>"And look how <em>great<em> that went."

Light and L were sitting in their king-sized bed in their three story house, looking over wedding pictures. Light was curled up next to L, his head resting slightly on his shoulder as they looked through the photo album.

L blinked. "I do not see what you mean."

"We adopted children that night. Our first night being married." Light reminded him. "You can't forget about them, they practically run our lives."

"I have brought up the option to take them back multiple times." L replied, eyeing the picture at Whammy's House. Light had a bundle in his arms as he stood by L, as well as two tiny toddlers standing below him.

"Over my dead body." Light growled protectively, amusing L. When the brunette caught the raven smiling, he added in, "We've had them for five years now. You can't say you don't love them either."

"I suppose I would be lying if I said such a thing, despite all the trouble they have caused us in the past…" L brought his thumb to his lip as he flipped the page, eyeing a picture from their eldest's birthday party, Mello.

He was turning three in the photo, but even then he was a trouble maker and a genius. A toxic combination. The blonde had chocolate icing smeared all over his face as he grinned at the camera. Matt, the middle child, smiled sweetly as he held up a handful of chocolate cake. He too had chocolate icing smeared on his face, probably from a food fight he and Mello had. Their youngest and less troublesome of the three, Near, sat in his high-chair on the left side of Mello. He was one then, but he was quite small for his age. He smiled shyly at the camera, his pale face soiled with chocolate, showing that even he didn't get out of the occasion clean.

"…Our three little devils." L commented after observing the picture.

Light nodded grimly, following L's gaze. "They are quite troublesome. But they have made our lives interesting. Imagine what would have happened in my drunken state if I had adopted boring children."

"Yes. It is a miracle that I was sober enough to choose my successors to adopt." L nibbled his nail softly, examining a more recent picture.

"Keeping the title of L in the family." Light added in.

L nodded. "Yes, they will inherit my job when they are older. I wonder if they are smart enough…"

"L. We're raising three geniuses. Need I remind you how Mello conned that restaurant manager into a free chocolate cake, how Near set the world record for the largest card tower, and how Matt had people betting on him at a video game store?"

L seemed to consider this before saying, "You are right. I was wrong to underestimate them."

"Daaaaddy!"

Right on cue. Loud foot steps could be heard thundering down the hallway as well as the constant repeat of Light's name.

Light groaned, sitting up and glancing at their digital clock. 2:30 AM. Nothing good comes from the children awake at two in morning.

"Probably Mello and Matt." L commented, closing the photo album and shifting towards the door.

Light huffed. "Isn't it always?"

The brunette yanked the master bedroom door open, causing a blonde and a redhead to freeze in their tracks. He raised an eyebrow. "What's going on, you two should be in bed."

"Matt took my chocolate!" Mello blurted out, pointing angrily at the young gamer.

Matt scowled at Mello, looking up from his silver Gameboy. "After you took my PSP! I was only trying to bribe you to get it back."

"Mello, you aren't supposed to have chocolate in your bedroom anyway." Light pointed out. "And why did you take Matt's PSP?"

"He had the volume up way too loud! I'm in the room next to him and it sounds like he's right next to me!"

Light turned his gaze to the guilty-looking redhead. "Matt?"

"I was just testing out the new speakers I got the other day…" he confessed. "I didn't know they were that loud."

A small boy in white pajamas approached them from behind, a toy robot wrapped protectively over his chest. He was rubbing his eye sleepily with the other hand. "Daddy, they are being too loud. I am tired of their constant fighting at night." he mumbled, before adding, "We have school tomorrow."

"I know, Near." Light reached over the bickering duo to ruffle Near's messy white hair. "Try to go back to sleep, alright? I'm handling it."

Near smiled shyly. "Thanks, Daddy… Tell Dad I said goodnight."

"Of course."

The small boy began to make his way back to his room, his baggy pajama pants dragging on the ground.

Light frowned disapprovingly at his other two sons. "You woke up Near. How do you feel about that?"

"We didn't mean to-" Mello started.

"Not good enough." Light interrupted. "You will apologize to him in the morning. Matt, give Mello back his chocolate and bring me your new speakers."

Matt's mouth gaped. "But I bought those with my bet money!"

Light sighed. His bet money. _It's great that Matt has a talent, but he doesn't need to get people betting on him. _"You'll get them back in the morning. Bring them here so the rest of us can go to sleep."

"Fine…" Matt groaned, stalking off to retrieve his speakers.

Mello's face twisted into a grin. "Good job, Daddy!"

"You're not off the hook." Light said sternly, cause Mello's face to turn into a pout. "I want your chocolate bars, and you're giving Matt back his PSP."

"But Daddy! I won't make a mess, I swear!"

"You don't need to be eating chocolate at this time of night."

Mello peeked around Light. "But Dad's eating candy!"

Light's eyes narrowed. He's told L about eating candy in the bedroom. "Oh, is he?"

He turned around, facing the raven who had froze, a cherry lollipop stuck in his mouth.

"What have I told you about eating sweets in the bedroom? It sets a bad example for the children."

L pulled the lollipop out, making a _pop! _sound. "I know, but I stay up at late hours. This is how I get my energy."

"That's your own damn fault." Light snapped. He was way too tired to deal with four children instead of three. "Take the candy into the kitchen if you have to eat it."

L pouted. "But Light…"

"No buts, L."

L stuck his lollipop back his mouth and cracked it in his teeth, pulling out the stick. He smirked at Light who rolled his eyes.

Mello tugged on Light's sleeve. "Can I eat my chocolate in the kitchen?"

"No, you have school tomorrow."

Mello crossed his arms. "School sucks!"

Light looked at him sternly. "Hey, no talking like that or I'll take your chocolate away for longer."

Mello scowled, but didn't say anything else.

Matt poked Light's back, his speakers in one hand and Mello's chocolate in the other. Light took them both. "Now go back to sleep." He moved his stern gaze to Matt. "If Mello doesn't return your PSP, come get me."

Matt nodded and turned to run back down the hall. "Night Daddy!" he called halfway down.

Mello was right behind him, his steps thumping loudly against the hard wood floor. "Yeah, night Daddy!"

Light kept a warm, motherly smile until they disappeared. He sighed in exhaustion, shuffling back into the bedroom and closing the door behind him.

"A mother's work is never done." L remarked, unwrapping another cherry lollipop.

Light glared at him, about to make a comment about the lollipop but decided to let is slide just this once. "Yeah, yeah. I bet you couldn't make it through one day doing my job."

L raised an eyebrow, sliding the lollipop through his placid lips. "Is that a challenge?"

"Yeah…" Light said thoughtfully, before grinning. "Yeah, it is."

"Alright." L allowed. "How about we make it interesting then?"

"You want to make a bet?" Light nearly laughed. L was aware of who took care of the children and did the housework, so why is he making it hard on himself?

L shrugged. "You seem confident that I will lose, I thought it would favor you."

Light chuckled. "Alright, alright. If I win… you go abstinent for a whole week."

L pouted. "But Light…"

"What's wrong, L? Scared of losing?" Light smirked. He knew L was impatient and didn't like going without sex for too long, so this would be the perfect punishment next to going without sweets. But an L without sugar was a dangerous L. That was the conditions of a past bet, and Light didn't want to go there again.

L blinked, his eyes narrowing. "Of course not. Those conditions are fine with me." He sucked on his lollipop thoughtfully, before pulling it out, making the same _pop!_ sound as earlier. "And if I win, I can have as many sweets whenever and however I like."

However. What does he mean by however? Light shook his head, not wanting to know. "Alright, L. You're on."

The brunette climbed back into the bed before being immediately pulled kiss by his husband. "Mmm… L, stop." he mumbled, pulling away.

But L pulled him back towards him firmly. "If I end up losing, I will have to go abstinent. I want to have you for one night before we do this bet."

Light gave in unwillingly as L began to suck on his neck. "B-But what if the kids hear us…"

"They won't." L mumbled through his skin.

"But they always do…"

L pushed Light down on the bed. "Then this time is not any different."

* * *

><p><strong>Done~ <strong>

**Yep, L doesn't like going without sex. Light's going to be the mother figure. Fun fun fun. **

**Matt is eight, Mello is nine, and Near is seven. Just thought I should clarify that.**

**Well, the whole idea for this family fic was just kinda pulled out of no where just so I could write it, so sorry if seems sloppy or poorly written. As I said before, I just wrote what came to mind.**

**But yeah. If you like the idea, review this chapter~**


	2. Morning

**Here's the second chapter. This is so much fun to write... xD **

**Anyway, enjoy~**

* * *

><p>"Light, you have been writing for quite a while. You are not a slow writer, so what could possibly be taking you so long?" L drawled, crouching on the end of their king sized bed.<p>

It was six o'clock in the morning, which is the start of Light's morning routine. Only today was different. Due to a bet made the night before, L would now be taking on all of Light's responsibilities.

And what would Light do?

Light gets the privilege to go stay at a resort for the day, getting massages and other rather feminine things, and overall relaxing from his exhausting job as the mother in the family.

"Just about finished L…" Light smirked as he wrote down today's schedule. Secretly, L had got the unfair end of the deal. The brunette just so happened to have a lot of things scheduled for today, and as he wrote them down, he was glad he wasn't going to have to do them.

L blinked. "You are smirking. What is so funny, Light?"

"Nothing, nothing." Light replied innocently, finishing his long schedule and passing it to his raven-haired husband.

L took it in his grasp, lifting it up with a thumb and index finger to inspect it. His face paled even more than it normally was, if that's possible. The schedule was, indeed, a rather long one. It read:

_6:30-7:00 Get the children up. Make sure they don't rip each other's limbs off while preparing their breakfast._

_7:00-7:25 Eat breakfast. Make sure every child has their homework completed before driving them to school._

_8:00-9:15 Arrive back at home. Do the house's laundry and clean the kitchen._

_9:15-10:35 Attend a meeting with the principal regarding Matt playing video games in class. Try not to scare her, or stare at the children. We want good results, Matt's reputation isn't very good with the teachers._

_10:40-12:30 Pull Mello out of school for his yearly physical. He is up for two booster shots. _

_12:45-1:45 After taking Mello back to school, unless something else comes in the way, you have some free time. Congratulations._

_2:00-2:30 The children get off the school bus at 2:30. Be sure that you are home during this time period._

_3:00-5:30 I promised the children I would take them to the park today, as well as a trip to the ice cream shop. Take them. While you are out, pick up food to prepare for tonight's dinner._

_6:00-8:30 Prepare and eat dinner. Once done eating, make sure any homework is out of the way before getting the kids ready for bed. _

_9:00-10:00 Children should be in bed. Your hard work is over. I should arrive soon after. If you don't chicken out before hand, that is._

"Light… There are a lot of things you have written that I will have to do." L stated.

Light grinned widely. "Scared, L? It's okay, you can always back out now."

L brought the paper down from his face to shoot the brunette a glare. "I am not 'backing down'. I think this is hardly fair, you do not do this every day."

"But if you can do this, then it proves you can do my job on any day." Light pointed out. After a few moments of staring at each other, Light broke the silence, "Now, ready to hear the conditions?"

"Fine." L muttered, placing the paper on top of his knees.

"Okay, first off, you must drive yourself to all of the destinations. No using Watari to make this easier for you." Light noted L's look of dismay and chuckled slightly before adding, "To make sure Watari doesn't assist you, he will be driving me to the resort today."

"But Light, I never drive." L pouted.

"L, you are the world's three greatest detectives and you're complaining to me about driving?" Light questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"It has been nearly ten years I have ever had to do such a thing." L deadpanned. "I do not know how my driving skills have changed."

Light waved his hand dismissively. "If you wreck, the children's blood is on your hands…"

"_Light!_"

L seemed truly distressed, making Light feel a bit sympathetic. Just this once. "L, I'm sure you'll do fine, I'm just joking. But I don't get the privilege to use Watari for everything under the sun, so you won't either."

"I supposed that is fair." L mumbled, frowning. "Okay, I will drive. Any other conditions, Light?"

Light nodded. "Oh yes. Condition number two. No telling the children about the bet. They favor me so they would most likely make it harder on you, but still. Telling them is an automatic win for me."

"I was not planning on doing such a thing." L said, his bored and unwilling stare traveling to his nearby laptop. Before he could type, however, Light closed it. L rolled his eyes. "Anything else?"

"If you, at any time, call me for _anything _that is not a life or death situation, then I win." Light recited that condition as if it was rehearsed.

L unwrapped a small chocolate that he had shoved in his pocket. "That will not be occurring, I am more than capable of playing the mommy role for the day."

"…I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that." Light said, shooting him a warning glance before continuing, "And if you, by some miracle, make it through the day with no help from me at all, then you win."

"It will be no miracle." L slid the chocolate through his pale lips to let the already half-melted chocolate melt all the way.

Light shook his head. "Too confident. You have no idea what you're about to get into."

"I am sure I don't." L sighed. "Hopefully watching you all these years will assist me today."

"Watching is different than the real thing. _Way_ different."

"I know."

"Alright, L. That's it." Light leaned over the end of the bed to plant a soft kiss on his husband's lips. "I'll be going now." He smirked. "Good luck."

L stood up to follow Light out of their bedroom. "Goodbye, Light. I will not lose."

"Too confident." Light repeated halfway down the hallway, looking of his shoulder to grin widely at him.

L watched the brunette walk out of sight. "We shall see."

* * *

><p>Mello crossed his arms at L as he, Matt, and Near came to a halt in the kitchen. "Where's daddy?"<p>

"Your daddy wanted to take a little break, so I am filling in for him." L replied, not looking up from the pancakes he was cooking. Pancakes are one of the only foods L knows how to make, so it's lucky that they have them.

"Liar." Mello countered. "Daddy never takes breaks. And if he did, he would have told us."

"He did not want you three to be disappointed, so he kept it to himself." L said calmly, scraping a slightly overcooked pancake out of the pan. "He will be back tonight."

Near twirled a piece of his white hair with one hand while he gripped his robot with the other. He was simply adorable, but so smart it's scary. But weren't they all? "I think there's a bet involved in all of this…"

Matt nodded as he played his PSP. "Yeah, I was thinking the same thing."

"A bet, huh? To see who's the better daddy?" Mello questioned. "Sorry dad, you're gonna lose. By a mile."

L poured more batter into the pan. "There is no bet. Is it that hard to believe your daddy took a small break?"

"Yes." all three said in unison.

Sighing, the raven-haired father looked down at his genius children. "Enough of this. All three of you are still in pajamas. You are not planning on going to school like that, are you?"

Matt and Near shook their heads absentmindedly, while Mello cried out, "Aha! You changed the subject, which means you're lying!"

L studied his oldest blankly. Genius children aren't boring, but are dangerous. Nothing gets past them. But one of the conditions is the children's aren't allowed to know, so L can't let anything slip. "Go get ready for school. Breakfast will be done in twelve minutes."

Mello snickered at his victory. "Race you guys!" Mello called, pushing Near down before making a mad dash towards the stairs.

Matt was on his heels, kicking at his feet in an attempt to trip him.

"Ha! No way in hell, Matt!" was faintly heard as they disappeared from L's sight.

All except for Near, who still sat on the ground. Normally when Mello played rough, he got back up and kept going, so this slightly worried L.

"Something wrong, Near?" L asked, concerned as he crouched down next to him.

The white-haired boy turned towards his father, a dismembered toy robot in his hands. An arm and a leg had came off, as well as the head. "They broke my robot. It was my favorite."

L frowned. He knew just how much that robot meant to Near. But how would Light handle the situation? "I am sorry, Near. I know you like that robot a lot." L said, trying to comfort his son. He reached out gently, collecting the pieces of the robot in his spidery hands. "I will try to fix it later."

Near nodded, staring blankly at the pieces. "Thank you, dad."

L hummed in response, ruffling Near's hair. "Now, go get ready for school. I will handle Mello when you come back down."

Near nodded, standing up and giving L a hug. L blinked once before returning it, remembering that's what Light would have done. Near smiled. "I feel better. I'll go get ready now."

L rose from the ground, watching his youngest climb up the wooden staircase.

He turned back to his pancake, which was overcooked at that pointed. "Ah well, nothing wrong with a being a little burnt…" L mumbled to himself, sliding the pancake onto a plate. He was about to cook the last pancake when-

_Crash! _"Mello!"

L blinked before sighing, pouring the batter on the pan before walking towards the stairs. "What is the issue?" he called in what he thought was loudly.

Apparently not.

_Crash! _"_Mello!_"

L climbed the stairs all the way. A video game case whirled his direction, and he ducked just in time to avoid it. "Mello?" he said as he entered Matt's room- the source of all the noise.

"Get your filthy paws off of my games, Mello!" Matt cried.

Mello glared at the redhead. "No way, you deserve it for tripping me!"

L blinked, not sure how to handle situation. "Mello, put the game cases down. Destruction of other's property is not handling the situation."

"Like hell it is!" Mello countered. "He tripped me."

"You shoved Near down in the kitchen and broke his robot," L pointed out, "and he is not throwing a temper tantrum like you are."

"Near's a coward." the blonde snapped. "Matt knows not to mess with me."

L looked at Matt's digital clock. 7:10. Uh oh. "We are running late. If you do not hurry, you will not be able to eat breakfast."

Mello calmed a bit. "…Chocolate chip pancakes?"

"I know you enough to know your favorite, Mello." L replied calmly before the blonde pushed him aside.

"Why didn't you say so? Last one there gets the least amount of pancakes!" He laughed over his shoulder, smirking as he thundered down the wooden stairs.

Matt dashed after him, his shirt half on as he raced down the stairs. He hastily pulled his head through. "No fair, Mello!"

Near scrambled out of his own room, buttoning up his white shirt. He had a rubix cube and a monster-like action figure in his arms to take the place of his dismembered toy.

L chuckled slightly as he watched the small, white-haired boy walk hurriedly down the stairs. He followed soon after, unfolding the list. _The day has only just begun and it feels like I have done so much_. He thought grimly as he reached the bottom of the stairs.

"Dad! Fire, quick!"

L's eyes widened. Fire? Could this get any worse? He rushed into the kitchen, examining the smoking, burnt pancake that he had been preparing before going to deal with Mello. The pancake was indeed on fire, three shocked children staring at it.

"Do we have a fire extinguisher?" L asked, glancing around quickly.

Mello whipped his head towards the raven. "Do we look like a fucking fire department?"

"Mello, watch your language." L warned.

"Language my ass!" Mello crossed his arms. "Put the fire out! Use water or something!"

Right. Water. L quickly filled a glass of water and poured it all of the burning pancake. _Ssssss! _

All three children let out a sigh of relief in unison.

"Way to go, daddy number two." Matt muttered.

L pouted. "I am trying my best, you know I do not do this everyday."

"Yeah, yeah." Mello grumbled, pulling a chocolate bar out of his favorite leather jacket. _How did that get there, didn't Light take his chocolate away last night…? _"Now we don't even have time for breakfast!"

"I will give you some money to purchase a school breakfast," L sighed as he opened a drawer beside him to retrieve the car keys. "We would not want you to be late."

"Wait, you're driving?" Mello choked.

The three children's eyes widened at once.

L rolled his eyes. "I am _not _a bad driver. I just don't drive often. Now let's go."

"Goodbye, life as we know it!" Matt cried dramatically as they walked out the door.

Near nodded in agreement. "This will be a risky drive to school."

L frowned. "You all have no faith in me."

* * *

><p>L sighed in exhaustion as he walked back into the door. They had nearly hit their neighbor's dog as they were pulling out, almost veered off the road three times, and got a ticket for going ten miles <em>below <em>the speed limit. He didn't think it was possible. After all, there's no such thing as being too careful. Mello had called him embarrassing.

"Alright, what is next on Light's little list…" L mumbled to himself, pulling the folded up piece of paper from his pocket.

Clean the kitchen.

L walked over to the uneaten pancakes and tossed them in the trash, along with pan with the burnt pancake. What Light doesn't know won't hurt him, and will certainly save L from some harsh teasing.

He poured out the milk he had prepared, scowling as he spilled some of Mello's chocolate milk on his white shirt. "It is helpful that laundry is next on the list…"

Since they had not actually eaten breakfast, the kitchen was relatively clean. Now on to the laundry.

L went from room to room, collecting the bins of dirty clothing and bringing them to the laundry room. He had always seen Light wash each load individually, but L thought it would be _much _easier if they washed them all together.

Since the washer could hold all the laundry, L decided to do it in groups. He would wash Light, Mello, and Near's clothes together, then wash L and Matt's last.

He dumped all the clothes for the first group in the washing machine, staring at the dial, his brown furrowed in confusion. "What did Light always set this to… I suppose I will just have to guess."

He seemed to have guessed right, the clothes came out clean. And only after three tries on the dryer did they come out dry. L considered it a victory that he made it out without messing anything up.

He shouldn't count himself out so fast.

L pulled off his soiled shirt and put it with the rest of his clothing. He dumped his faded jeans and white shirts into the wash with Matt's red and black striped shirts and dark jeans. Set them for the same cycle as before and left it for about 30 minutes.

But when he went to bring them out, his face visibly paled. All of his white shirts had turned a light pink color. All of them. Which means he's going to have to where a pink shirt out into public.

Now normally L didn't care much for appearance, but this was just degrading. Not to mention the next thing on his list was a meeting with Matt's principal that Light didn't want him to mess up on. Wearing Easter pink like it's his favorite color… L winced, transferring the load into the dryer. _Light will never let me hear the end of this one…_ He winced again. At least laundry was over. That's a bright side to it, right? …Right?

* * *

><p>L arrived at Maple Grove Elementary School, the school in which their children were currently enrolled at. He had gotten the driving thing down for the most part. One squirrel didn't get out so lucky, but L blames the rodent for being in the middle of the lane, not him.<p>

L stepped out of the car, grimacing again at his light pink shirt. _At least I am not dealing with Mello… Mello would certainly say something about this. Though Matt can be quite sarcastic… _He shook his head, his raven locks falling his face as he approached the front entrance.

He strolled into the office. Luckily, the rest of the school was in class, so he wouldn't have to worry about ignorant elementary students saying whatever comes to mind.

The secretary snickered under her breath as her eyes rested on L. He rolled his eyes as he approached the desk. "What can I help you with today, sir?"

"Yes, I am here for a meeting with my son and the principal…"

She raised an eyebrow. "Oh, Matt? He's a cute kid." The secretary pointed behind her down a small hallway. "They're in the back room past these desks."

L gave her a small nod. "Thank you."

The raven-haired father walked past the desks and down the small hallway slowly, dreading opening the door and having his son insult him in front of administration. With Matt being as sarcastic as he is, L wouldn't put it past him to do such a thing.

He let his hand rest on the doorknob, hesitating a few moments before opening it. An older woman with shoulder-length brown hair sat at the principal's desk. She wore a black dress shirt and silver rimmed glasses.

Matt sat in one of the cushioned chairs in front of the polished wood desk, his feet resting idly at the on the desk as he played on his DS. He looked up from his game, his eyes flashing. "Dad, are you trying to embarrass me? Because with that shade of pink, it's much more embarrassing for you. You'd look much nicer in a darker shade."

"Matt…" L warned, shooting him a glance.

The principal smiled awkwardly. "Ah, you must be Mr. Lawliet. I'm Dr. Carpenter." She extended a hand towards me.

He nodded, shaking hands with her before crouching in the seat next to the redhead. "It is a pleasure."

Dr. Carpenter directed her gaze towards Matt. L noticed it harden considerably. "Matt, would you please get your feet off my desk now and turn off your game?"

"Would you please stop talking while I beat my highscore?" Matt countered casually as he concentrated on his DS.

The principal frowned and moved her gaze back to the raven. "See? He has this "I don't care" attitude, and a lot of his teachers are tired of it. Don't get me wrong, he's brilliant. Straight A's-"

"Naturally." Matt cut in.

Dr. Carpenter narrowed her eyes. "Anyway, we just don't want this kind of behavior in the classrooms."

L nodded. "I can see why the teachers disapprove of this behavior. We certainly have not raised him this way."

"Yeah you have." Matt muttered, before breaking into a grin, nearly jumping out of his chair. "Woo! New highscore!" He blinked when he received disapproving stares from both the principal and his father. "What, I've been trying to beat that score since first period."

She eyed his DS. "He also has a really bad habit of playing those in class when he gets bored. But every time the teacher takes one up, he takes out another."

"I have ten gameboys, five PSPs, ten DS's, two iPads, fifteen gameboy colors…" He yawned tiredly, cutting off his sentence. "Should I go on?"

L raised an eyebrow. "How have you accumulated so many different gaming systems?"

"Bet money." Matt replied simply.

"That's another thing too." The principal added. "He gets children to bet him during lunch period, and ends up taking all of their money. The children are tired of it."

"I can't help I'm good at video games!" the redhead protested. "You have your sucky teaching job that gets you minimum wage, and I double your weekly salary in one lunch period. If anything, you're jealous, 'teach."

"Dr. Carpenter." the brunette corrected.

"Doctor of what? Getting on my nerves?" Matt complained. "I can't concentrate with all of your bitching."

"Matt." L cut in sharply. Light certainly wouldn't approve. "You will not copy Mello's use of foul language."

"Mello's ten times worse than I am. I normally only say damn, bitch, or ass, but Mello says-"

L covered his son's mouth quickly, not sure how exactly to shut him up. "That is enough." He attempts being stern, but it just made Matt laugh.

"Daddy would laugh at you." he mumbled through L's pale hand.

L sighed. "Yes, he probably would. But that is not the point right now. Will you quit playing video games in class?"

L moved his hand off of the redhead's mouth so he could reply.

"Hell no, I've trying to beat this Zelda game by the end of the day."

L frowned at the use of yet another cuss word. Matt does not have a foul mouth, so he knows where this is coming from, "Are you trying to make this hard on me? Because with Light you are so much more cooperative."

"I'm not interested in you and daddy's little bet, okay?" Matt groaned. "You're going to lose, but I'm not interested. And I'm not trying to help daddy win."

Liar. The downside to having genius children: they are excellent liars, they can see through anything, and they can come up with devious plans of their own.

"Actually, Mr. Lawliet…" Dr. Carpenter interrupted. "We're more looking for a specific discipline action. Taking the consoles up isn't doing anything, so what do you recommend?"

"Send him to the office and call our house." L replied. "Either I or my husband will take care of him."

Matt paled slightly, but didn't look up from his DS. He knew L wasn't that much of a threat. But if Light learned what had happened today and came back in... Matt would not get off so easily. L smiled at his visible win.

"Oh.. Alright, we will do that sir. Thank you." the principal replied, typing the information into the computer before giving L a small smile.

L turned an innocently kind gaze to Matt, which looked like a mocking tease to the redhead. "Now, we will not be playing any more video games during instructional time, will we? I would hate it if I had to come back, would you not?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Matt muttered, closing his DS and pulling his feet off the desk.

L smiled a small smile at his victory. "Good. Then this meeting is over?" He gave the principal a questioning glance.

She blinked. "I suppose so. It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Lawliet."

"The same for you, Dr. Carpenter."

Matt followed L out of the principal's office. "You basically blackmailed me!" he accused.

"You embarrassed me when I entered the meeting." L replied calmly. "I was simply returning the gesture in a different approach."

"You don't get embarrassed." he countered. "I know, Mello has tried before."

"I know." the raven smirked slightly. Then he remembered. "That is right, I have to pull Mello out of school for his physical…"

Matt grinned widely. "Is he getting shots?"

"Yes, two boosters. Is there a reason why you are asking this?" L asked, raising an eyebrow.

Matt walked out of the office casually. "Oh, nothing. Mello just _hates _shots. You've never seen it before, but let's just say I'm glad I'm not with you." L felt himself pale. If he thought Matt was hard to deal with…

Matt laughed and waved in farewell before heading down the hallway, grinning evilly. "Good luck!"

* * *

><p><strong>Poor, poor L. He's made it so far, though! :D <strong>

**Review if you liked this chapter, or the story in general. You don't have to, but I'd appreciate it.**


	3. Doctor

**Here's chapter three~**

**Mello takes a trip to the doctor. This will go _great_**. **\sarcasm**

**Disclaimer: The song lyrics, which are in italics, are owned by LMFAO, not me. I'd be rich if I owned that song. **

**Anyway, enjoy~**

* * *

><p>"Dad, what's the meaning of this?" Mello asked as he strolled up to the front desk. He had a quizzical look on his face as he bit into his bar of chocolate.<p>

L tipped his head to the side. Light must have refrained from telling Mello about his doctor's appointment. Smart move, but it made the raven-haired father unnerved. Just how bad could this get?

"I am taking you to an anger management class," L lied smoothly, keeping a blank expression on his face. When Mello gaped, he added in, "It was your father's idea, not mine."

The blonde's eyes narrowed. "This is ridiculous! I don't have an anger problem." He paused. "Also, it doesn't seem like something daddy would do…"

"Mello, you do in fact have a bit of a problem with your temper. Need I remind you how you nearly demolished Matt's video game collection earlier this morning?" L pointed out.

Mello crossed his arms. "He started it!"

"Do you think that would be a solid argument with your father?"

Mello hesitated, glaring up at L before taking a defeated bite out of his chocolate and letting his gaze fall to the floor. "…No…"

L nodded in approval. "Exactly. I will accompany you in the class, so hopefully it will not be too stressful."

Mello began walking out of the office towards the main entrance. He snorted. "Hell, you'll probably make it more stressful on me."

"Mello," L said quickly, hinting at the blonde's use of a cuss word.

Mello waved his hand dismissively as the pair entered the parking lot. "Yeah, yeah. No profanity, got it."

"If you truly did, however, you wouldn't repeat your actions."

"Dad, I'm going to anger management classes. Cut me some slack, will you?" Mello snapped, yanking the car door opened and throwing his black backpack inside.

L smirked at his son's clueless behavior as he slid into the driver's seat. But he also felt uneasiness. Angry Mello is a dangerous Mello. Scared Mello can be just as dangerous. Combine the two… people could die.

At least they're going to be in a doctor's office.

* * *

><p>"Dad…"<p>

L didn't respond. He swerved the car to avoid hitting a biker, causing the man on the vehicle to shake his fist and yell an insult at him. They were almost to the pediatrician. And he knew Mello knew it. So, not answering for now is the best idea.

"Dad…" Mello called louder this time, his voice filled with uneasiness.

Again, L ignored him. He reached over and turned the volume nod up a bit more, blasting a dance-pop song throughout the car.

_Party rock is in the house tonight…_

_Everybody just have a good time._

_These lyrics are horribly written. _L noted to himself as the sound pounded against his eardrums. Even with the volume up this loud, Mello managed to make himself known. "Dad!"

_And we gonna make you lose your mind…_

"Turn the volume down!" He shrieked.

_We just wanna see you…_

"_Dad!_"

_Shake that._

His blonde son thrust himself from the back seat as he unbuckled his seatbelt, pressing the volume button in and turning the radio completely off. He was panting in what L assumed extreme anger. The raven glanced up at the rearview mirror, noticing his son was digging his nails into the leather seats.

"Quit ignoring me!" he snapped. "How could you like that pop garbage over talking to me?"

L knew he couldn't ignore Mello any longer. He made eye contact with the chocloholic in the mirror, his eyes blank and revealing nothing. "I am not ignoring you. I just happen to like that song. Is there a problem in that?"

"You _hate _music like that." Mello countered. "You listen to Beethoven and classical music. Not that shitty stuff the public passes as music."

"My preference varies. Today I was in the mood for that particular radio station." L made a left turn, bringing them one step closer to the pediatrician. _Not that far away now…_

"Oh yeah? Since you like that song so much, what's the name?"

Dang. L was hoping Mello wouldn't corner him like that. He brought a thumb up to his lips, steering the car with one hand. _They said a particular phrase quite a bit… _"Party Rock?" he tried, glancing at his son over his shoulder.

Mello raised an eyebrow. "Party Rock _What_?"

L mentally pouted. _There's a third word?_

"Party Rock Dance?" He knew he was wrong. Especially when Mello narrowed his eyes both in victory and in anger at being lied to.

"Party Rock _Anthem_." Mello corrected. "See, you don't even know the song's name so you can't be a fan of it."

L quickly moved his hand from his lips to make a sharp right turn, causing a car near him to blow their horn loudly. "Fine. I am not a fan of that song. Are you happy?"

"So you _were _avoiding talking to me."

The raven didn't respond. They were only one more right turn away from being at the doctor's office. He's trying to put off Mello finding out as long as possible.

"And you're avoiding talking to me now." Mello went on. L heard his seat belt unbuckle. "I _know_ where we are, dad. This is the direction to the doctor's office."

Mello crawled out of the back and plopped himself in the passenger's seat, staring at L with expectant, yet obviously pissed off, blue eyes. "Don't you lie to me. It wouldn't be good for you."

"Ah. Is that a threat?" L replied calmly, keeping his gaze fixed on the road.

"No, it's a _promise_." Mello replied, glaring. "You lied to me. We're going to the doctor's instead, aren't we? You made the anger management class up."

L ignored him once more, making a right turn into a parking lot and silently answering Mello's question.

"The doctor's is _worse_ than anger management classes!" Mello went on, his voice rising a few notches. L could detect a hint of fear in his voice. "It's definitely not something to joke around with. Especially with me."

L parked the car right in front of the entrance. He parked a bit crookedly, but he didn't see any crime done in parking halfway in one parking spot and halfway in the other. "Relax, Mello. This is just a physical- a check-up."

"Easy for _you _to say." Mello bit back as he reluctantly climbed out the passenger seat. "You never get sick. I bet you've never been to the doctor once."

"I have been to the doctor three times in my life. They were check-ups, like the one you are going to. It was not a terrifying experience."

L pulled the keys out of the ignition and climbed out of the driver's seat, slamming the door behind him. He pressed the lock button the control pad before beginning to stroll towards the main entrance. When he didn't hear Mello behind him, he stopped.

"Mello. You are attending this appointment." L said firmly as he glanced over his shoulder. Mello was standing by the car, his heated stare burning into the raven's back. The gaze was filled with both fear and anger, but he looked more terrified than furious.

"…Shots? Are there gonna be shots?" The blonde's voice shook slightly.

L figured lying would be the only way to get Mello in the office, so he went ahead with it. "I am unsure of whether or not there will be. I did not make the appointment, Light did."

Mello huffed and began taking rushed steps towards him. "If I get pricked with one needle, you both owe me chocolate. And lots of it."

"That can be arranged." L allowed, moving a finger up to his lips as they entered the building.

Mello snorted and jabbed the up arrow on the elevator next to the front entrance. They rode up the elevator in the silence, Mello throwing occasional glares the raven's direction which L ignored.

_Ding! _They walked out of the elevator and into a hallway lined with different doors to different doctor's office. L was about to turn when he froze. He seemed to have forgotten something rather important.

"…Mello, what room is your pediatrician?" L couldn't believe he forgot. It has been four years since he's accompanied Light for their appointments, but L almost never forgets anything no matter how small.

Mello scoffed. "You forgot? I dunno, I hate this place. Call daddy, he should know."

L blinked. If he dialed Light's number, he would be defeated. That's not going to happen. L is very childish and hates losing. And losing to Light is even more humiliating, considering Light won't let it go for at least a month or two. Plus, he had an idea, and L would have to win for that plan to be successful. Light may not be too pleased with it, though.

"…I cannot do that." L answered simply.

Mello raised an eyebrow, his eyes flashing with irritation. "Why not?"

"It would be wrong to disturb him on his day off." L began walking in a random direction, changing the subject. "We will just ask an employee."

"I'm sure daddy wouldn't mind." Mello argued as he ran a bit to catch up to L. "…Unless, this is part of that bet you two made."

L shook his head. "I did not make any sort of bet, contrary to popular belief…"

"Somehow I find that hard to believe." Mello remarked sarcastically. "Look, just call daddy and get the damn bet over with. You aren't losing anything that important, right?"

"…" L didn't answer as he opened the door to the nearest room.

"Oh fuck, it has to do with sex, doesn't it?" Mello said rather loudly, rewarding L with disapproving glances from many parents as they entered a random office.

L gave him a sharp look. "Watch your language," he said blankly for the one hundredth time. "And there is no bet, no matter how much you want there to be."

Mello snorted. "_Right_."

L didn't respond as he walked towards the front desk, a female secretary looking up from her computer screen as he approached. "Yes, is there something I can help you with?"

"My son has an appointment today and I seem to have forgotten the room it is located." L replied, causing the brunette behind the desk to raise an eyebrow.

"Okay… Well, I might be able to help you," She typed a few things before looking up at them through light brown bangs. "What's his pediatrician's name?"

L blinked. "Would you believe me if I told you I forgot that also?"

The secretary gave him a long look before sighing. "A bit forgetful, are we? No worries, I might be able to find his appointment in the database… Do you remember your son's name?"

L returned the long look blankly, before replying, "Of course. Mello Lawliet."

"Mello? Unique name…" the secretary muttered to herself as she typed on her computer.

"Damn straight," Mello muttered under his breath, causing L to elbow him in the arm. "Ow!"

The brunette blinked. "Alright… Dr. Cadence on floor three. You guys at least got the floor right. And the room is…" She clicked a few things. "…Room 306. Right down the hall to your right."

"I appreciate this more than you know." L sighed, turning and walking towards the exit of the doctor's office. He heard his son following close behind, stomping as he muttered something about hating the doctor.

* * *

><p>They entered the office right on time. The office secretaries were just about to cancel Mello's appointment. Considering the events that were about to take place, maybe that would have been the best outcome.<p>

"Mello Lawliet?" After a few moments of waiting, they were called back in the examination room.

Mello sat down on a stool, his arms crossed as he watched his pediatrician warily. "You stick any needles in me and you'll regret living."

Dr. Cadence looked over her shoulder. She was standing on her toes, reaching into a cabinet to retrieve a blood pressure machine. "Oh? Shots aren't a bad thing, Mello. They help you stay healthy."

Mello's eyes widened slightly. "What are you hinting at? That I'm gonna get shots?"

L gave the doctor a quick glance, not wanting this situation to spiral out of control. It was only a matter of time before he figured it out, but why make it happen before the examination even begins?

Dr. Cadence nodded at the raven as she went back on flat feet, the blood pressure machine in her hands. "I'm not sure what we have to do yet, Mello. Let's just focus on the easy stuff, alright?"

Mello snorted but didn't reply. L watched as the pediatrician proceeded to record his son's height and weight.

"Hm… 4' 5''. Below average." the pediatrician noted, writing it down on her clipboard.

Mello raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me? Are you calling me short?"

"Not short, just a bit below average. Nothing wrong with that." Dr. Cadence replied, smiling. "Now let's check your weight."

This is where Mello should be hurting because of his chocolate addiction, but he, like L, doesn't gain weight because he's constantly using his mind. That doesn't keep him out of risk of contracting diabetes, which is something Light stresses daily with both Mello and L.

"59 pounds. Not bad." Dr. Cadence commented and scribbled the information down. "Have you been laying off the chocolate?"

Mello scoffed. "What kind of question is that? Of course not."

The pediatrician gave L a questioning look. The raven-haired father blinked. "It is harder than it looks to keep him from eating it. We take it away and he somehow accumulates more."

"I see." Dr. Cadence nodded. "Children can be stubborn."

Or they could be stubborn geniuses which, unfortunately, Mello was. In fact, all three of his sons were. But if he had to label one of them the king of being stubborn, it would be Mello for sure.

Mello pulled a chocolate bar out of his leather jacket pocket, unwrapping it in one brisk move before bringing it to his lips to break a chunk off.

The pediatrician laughed while L just stared at him blankly. "I have no clue where he got that from."

"And you never will." Mello smirked as he bit off another piece.

At that point, Dr. Cadence was already wrapping the blood pressure strap around Mello's thin arm. Mello eyed it warily as she went to flip the switch. "I hate this thing. It squeezes the _hell _out of my arm."

She laughed awkwardly, flipping the switch on. "Well, that's how it reads your blood pressure. Sorry, I know it's uncomfortable."

The machine began to squeeze the chocoholic's arm, causing his face to twist in discomfort. It was halfway done when he promptly ripped it off. "It feels like my arm is going to pop off."

"…It tends to feel like that." the pediatrician sighed as she went to reattach it. "Please, Mello. It won't last a minute if you can just be patient."

Mello snorted. "Whatever."

This time, Mello managed to get through the whole thing. He let out a breath of relief as it shut off. L smirked slightly. "Are you alright, Mello?"

Mello glared at L through his blonde locks. "Shut up. I hate this doctor stuff."

The pediatrician chuckled as she wrote down the results from the blood pressure machine. "Everything seems fine. Now all we have left is…" She hesitated as she read the three words.

The blonde sitting on the stool raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"

"Erm…two booster shots."

Mello gaped. "No, hell _no_." he snapped as he stood up.

L reached over and grabbed his wrist, preventing him from leaving. "Mello, think rationally. They are shots. You will not suffer any major injury from two needle pricks."

"I don't want those needles anywhere near me!" he shrieked, trying to yank his arm from L's grasp. His father was strong, however, and kept him frozen in place.

L looked up at Dr. Cadence, who was just standing there, unsure of what to do. "You can prepare the shots. I can hold him."

She nodded slowly and opened a nearby drawer. The blonde pediatrician pulled out two syringes and two bottles of medicine. She jabbed through the top of the bottle and pulled the syringe back, drawing in the medicine.

Mello's eyes widened and he began to struggle more. "No, no, no, no, no…"

"_Mello. _Calm down." L was struggling to keep the writhing nine-year-old still who was now pushing his hand against his chest in an attempt to push himself away from the raven.

The pediatrician was now walking towards them with the two syringes. Mello, now finding that struggling was getting no where, thrust his foot into L's chest in an attempt to release him. L grunted, blinking a glare at the blonde as his grip loosened. He fell off the chair he was perched on, landing on his back. Mello took advantage of this and yanked his arm away and made a running dash for the door.

L quickly pulled himself into a crouching stance. He wasn't going to make this harder by having doctors chase him down and restrain him. It would be better if he did it himself. The raven crawled quickly across the floor before leaping forward, grasping Mello's wrist as he landed. L pulled himself back into a crouching position and gripped his son's wrist tightly. Mello was a mere step towards the door, and L was not going to let him get away that easily.

He looked up at the pediatrician through his messy, raven locks, who looked a bit worried, and said in a surprisingly irritated voice, "Give. Him. The. Shots. Now." He placed emphasis on each word, making it sound even more commanding.

"Let me go, dad!" Mello shrieked, attempting to kick him again. L swerved this time.

Dr. Cadence took long, quick strides towards the duo. She promptly stuck the needle in Mello's arm as she reached them, causing Mello to shake and scream. "Get it out, get it out, get it out!"

As soon as the medicine was injected into Mello, the blonde pediatrician dropped the syringe on the floor unceremoniously before proceeding to inject Mello with a second needle.

Mello shrieked again and attempted to swat at the pediatrician. Before he could make contact, however, L restrained the other wrist by grabbing it.

Dr. Cadence quickly injected him and pushed the medicine in before finishing with a relieved sigh. She pulled the needle out. "There. Done."

L sighed as well, releasing his grip on his son's wrists. Mello rubbed where he got the shots. "You stabbed me!"

"You were attempting to hit both me and your father." the doctor countered. "Although, this is improvement from last time. Last time your siblings and your other father had to restrain you."

"That was abuse," Mello accused as he recalled that moment. "I couldn't move at all."

"You were threatening to skin us alive." Dr. Cadence replied, raising an eyebrow.

L gave Mello a questioning glance, which he replied to by rolling his eyes. "There weren't any instruments that I could have using to skin anyway. Though I could have drugged you..."

"I apologize, Dr. Cadence." L said blankly, cutting his son off. He stood from his crouched position while keeping his gaze fixed on his son, as if afraid he was going to attack him again.

The pediatrician laughed lightly. "No worries. If it makes you feel better, we've had way worse children before."

"Somehow, that does give me some faith…" L mumbled through his nail as he chewed it.

Mello scowled, bringing out his unfinished chocolate bar from earlier and biting out a chunk. "Whatever. Come on dad, let's go."

L blinked down at Mello before looking sideways at Dr. Cadence. "Is there anything else?"

The blonde did a quick scan of her clipboard before shaking her head. "Nope! You guys are free to go. Have a nice day!"

"Too late for that." Mello muttered under his breath as he followed his father out of the examination room.

L smirked slightly as he walked down the hallway. "And you say you do no need anger management classes. I probably have an imprint of your foot in my chest, all because two mere shots."

Mello gave him a death glare and bit into his chocolate bar. "Shut up."

* * *

><p><strong>Mello has a <em>huge<em> fear of needles. I orginally planned on making this Near, but Mello is more fun to write with.**

**Anyways, review if you enjoyed. It's slightly short than my past chapters, which is my only problem. Hopefully the next chapter will be longer.**


	4. Park

**A/N: **It's been about six days since I promised an update. Sorry, I haven't been in a writing mood and every time I would open Word, my mind would draw a blank. I'm surprised I managed to write this. Anyway, enjoy chapter four~

* * *

><p>L sat in the booth in a quaint coffee shop he and Light visited quite often. He was relieved Light had been merciful enough to squeeze in an hour of free time for him because, honestly, the kids were driving him insane.<p>

Luckily the sugar from his strawberry cheesecake was taking the edge off of the rare stress that he was feeling. He solves _murder cases _every day, yet he's never felt more stressed than he feels right now. Mello has lost his mind over a few needle pricks, and Matt decided to be smart-ass in front of the principal. He was thankful that at least one of his children wasn't so troublesome.

A waitress approached his table, smiling a grin that, at the moment, was slightly annoying to L. "Can I get you anything else, sir?"

L took an experimental sip of his coffee, frowning. Not sweet enough. "I will acquire a few more cubes of sugar, if that's all right." He glanced down at his watch. 1:24. Dang. He has to leave soon. "Also, a few more slices of this cake to go…"

* * *

><p>"Ha! Beat you, Matt!" Mello teased as he burst through the front door of their house.<p>

Matt trudged in lazily behind him, a PSP gripped tightly in his fingertips. Rolling his eyes, he replied, "I wasn't racing you, remember?"

Mello grinned anyway. "Whatever. I still won."

Matt glanced up, eyeing a small boy sitting in at the kitchen table, a knee drawn up to his chest and lock of white hair twirling between his fingertips. He knew exactly what kind of effect this would have on Mello, so he smiled slightly. "Look again, Mells."

Mello's victorious grin turned into a look of confusion as he followed Matt's gaze behind him. As his eyes laid on Near, he loud out a disapproving shout, "What the- I was with you the whole time! How did you…!"

Near, still twirling his hair in his fingers, smirked slightly. "Always first, Mello…"

This was an inside message between Mello and Near. Near was always first in everything at Whammy's. If Mello got a 99 on a test, Near would get a 100. If Mello scored three goals in soccer, Near would go out of his comfort zone and score four. If Mello declared he could eat five chocolate bars in ten minutes, Near would be him at his own game. Near was always right above Mello, even in the rankings at the orphanage.

Mello's eyes widened in rage. "Why you little…!" He lunged at the young boy before he was stopped by the redhead behind him.

Matt was grasping onto Mello's leather jacket, holding back the wiggling blonde. "Easy there, tiger."

L, deciding he had seen enough, walked into the kitchen from the hallway where he was standing. "Welcome home. Near, Matt, Mello."

Mello frowned at the raven-haired detective as he glanced at his arm, eyeing the beige band-aid he had received to keep his injections from getting infected. "Hey, Dad. Still don't forgive you for earlier."

"Mello, it has been an hour." L stated blankly before adding, "But even so, the shots were in your benefit. They keep you healthy."

Mello snorted, brushing his shoulder-length blonde hair out of his face. Light always pestered him about getting it cut, but L didn't see a problem with it. Not everyone has to have a perfect hairstyle like Light did. He recalled all the times Light tried to fix L up like he was on their wedding day, but he would have none of it. The other two children simply hummed or gave him a nod in greeting.

Mello tossed his black backpack on the kitchen table unceremoniously before announcing, "Daddy said he would take us to the park today, so now you have to."

"I am well aware." L replied flatly. "Did all of you get your homework done?"

"Didn't have any." Matt responded simply, though L suspected he wasn't telling the whole truth.

"I did it during school," Mello and Near said in unison, causing Mello to give him a sharp glare.

L smiled a small smile but as soon as it appeared, it was gone. "All right. We will leave in about fifteen minutes, so make the necessary preparations."

Mello took off running up the stairs, the other two children right on his heels. Just as soon as they reached their rooms, the fighting started. L's got to say, it's a record for them. Normally they had ripped each other's throats out on the way _into _the house. He's glad he didn't have to deal with that.

"Matt, don't touch my leather jacket!" Mello snarled from the top of the stairs.

"What was that? Sorry, can't hear you over the fact that you _stole my Mario game this morning_." L heard the gamer shoot back. "And don't say you didn't, 'cause Near wouldn't do it."

"Near wouldn't do it my ass!"

L felt a throb at his head- the signs of his first stress-induced headache beginning. He could already tell this wasn't a good idea.

* * *

><p>"What do you mean you don't have chocolate sauce?" Mello shrieked at the employee at the ice cream parlor. "What kind of ice-cream shop doesn't have <em>chocolate sauce<em>?"

L blinked as the headache worsened. "Mello. You had a chocolate bar in the car on the way over here."

"So? I need chocolate sauce on my ice-cream!" Mello growled back.

"Are you PMSing or something?" Matt grumbled under his breath as his fingers danced across the buttons on his DS. Most eight-year-olds didn't know what that meant, but L had genius children who knew how to work a computer. And there are so many things a young child can learn from the internet, and not all of them are positive.

"Shut up, Matt!" the blonde snapped.

The employee blinked. He looked confused and was unsure on how to handle the situation. L didn't blame him; he didn't look much older than a teen, and Mello was being quite demanding. "Uh… You can have chocolate ice-cream, would that work?"

L closed his eyes briefly, expecting the explosion from Mello before it happened.

"No, it's not the same!" he retorted, slamming his hands down on the counter. "That's like saying caramel ice-cream is the same thing as caramel sauce. Or strawberry sauce is the same thing as strawberry ice-cream. Get what I'm saying?"

"I…guess?" the employee said slowly. "Look, kid, if you don't make a decision soon we're going to have to throw you out."

"I suggest that Mello makes a decision quickly…" Near said quietly, twirling his hair and gripping a monster figurine.

Mello shot the albino a death glare. "No one asked for your opinion, Near!"

"Mello. I will say this again. You had chocolate on the way here. You don't need to have this much chocolate." L sighed, rubbing his temple lightly. "Light wouldn't approve, would he?"

"I'm the fucking successor to L, I can have as much chocolate as I damn well please!" Mello exploded. He was certainly not in the mood for games. Either that or he, like Matt, was purposely making this hard on L.

"All three of us are successors to L," Near reminded him, a hint of irritation in his tone.

"I'm not," Matt said flatly as he concentrated on his game. "I want more to my life than just solving crimes later on."

"All right, then Mello and I are-"

"I don't care!" Mello yelled, interrupting Near's low monotone.. "I just want my chocolate sauce on my chocolate ice-cream with chocolate chips on-Mmph!"

Matt clamped his hand over Mello's mouth, holding his DS in the other. "I want vanilla ice-cream with gummi bears and strawberry syrup," he ordered, keeping his hand pressed against the blonde's lips. Normally L would disapprove, but considering the situation at hand, he let it pass. Just this once. "Near, order. Quick, he might get some sick idea soon…"

Near gave a small nod. His normally expressionless face was pulled into a slight smirk as he observed Mello try and pry himself from Matt's grip. "I would like mint chocolate chip… With whipped cream."

L noticed Matt was struggling to keep his brother contained, so he quickly added in his order. "I would like a slice of strawberry ice cream cake."

After L ordered, Matt released Mello, scowling and wiping his hand on his jeans. "You licked me, sicko."

Mello glared back. "Don't you _ever _do that again, Mattie. _Ever_."

The employee, after he finished preparing Near's, L's, and Matt's treat, gave Mello an uncomfortable look. "Hey, kid… You going to order now?"

Mello waved his hand dismissively. "Just get me chocolate ice cream with whatever chocolate thing you've got on top."

"All right, the total comes to $15.34." the employee said to L, who promptly handed him a credit card.

After paying for the ice-cream, the group walked out of the small ice-cream parlor. They got collective stares from everyone in the shop as they exited, all of them silent after hearing Mello's outburst. L stared down at Mello sternly, gripping a plastic fork between his thumb and index finger. "You act this immature in an ice-cream parlor and you expect me to take you to a park filled with other children?"

Mello smirked into his chocolate-filled treat. "You don't have a choice. Daddy told you to, and if you don't take us, we'll tell him. And you'll lose your little bet."

"For the final time, there is no bet," L lied yet again.

Matt smirked. "We know when you're lying."

"Do you?" L mumbled dryly as they walked down the sidewalk towards the park.

Matt tossed his empty cup that used to have ice-cream in it into a nearby trash can. "Just eat your cake, Dad. You have nothing to worry about. After all, we're always angels, right?"

L became uneasy at Matt's innocent sarcasm. He was right, this definitely wasn't a good idea.

* * *

><p>It was hard to keep up with all three children at once. L learned that quickly after he arrived at the city's playground which, since today was a nice day, was crawling with children of all ages.<p>

Near was easy to keep up with, considering he didn't go berserk like his siblings. Also, due to his strange hair color, it's easy to pick him out of the crowd.

Matt had taken off with his bag of video games and various gaming systems when he arrived and L hasn't seem him since. He's probably betting every child in his sight that he can beat them in a video game. L will have to confiscate half his earnings later- a rich genius child is a dangerous genius child.

Mello was anywhere and everywhere at once. One second he was swinging on the monkey bars and the next he was chasing some other child for no particular reason. He was the one L was worried about. After all, Mello has been the cause of everything wrong so far. The ice-cream parlor, attacking Near earlier that morning, the doctor… The only thing L can say he didn't do was Matt at the principal's.

L blinked and turned his head to the side to get a better look at the park. He was crouching on a wooden bench in front of the large, metal structure, his headache worsening at the sound of all the children squealing. He immediately saw Near, who was playing with his toys under a nearby tree. Mello was… He didn't know. Same for Matt.

He wiggled his toes over each other and brought a finger to his lip. _Should I be keeping up with all of the children? It is an awfully hard job, considering Mello can't keep still… But I'm sure if they got kidnapped Light would make sure it's the end of me._

And so, with that thought, L shifted in his crouch position to step off of the bench. The first child he would find would be Mello, and then…

"Moooooommy! Mommy! Help!"

A desperate cry from a seven year old boy cut through the air as the child ran in front of him. Following right behind him was a blonde-haired boy in leather. Mello, there's not mistaking it.

"I'll skin you alive!" he roared, hot on the younger boy's heels.

L held out his arm and grabbed onto Mello's jacket as he raced passed. His body jerked forward, but was held firmly in place with L's strength. He was panting as he looked up at L, trying to yank out of his grasp. "Let me go, Dad!"

"Why are you chasing that child?" L asked calmly.

Mello scrunched his eyebrows in anger. "Because he called my hair girly! No one says that and gets away with it!"

"Mello, he is only picking on you because he has insecurities of his own," L explained, eyeing the small boy who was standing a few feet away. "Don't let childish insults offend you so much."

"Childish insults my-" Just before the profanity to leave Mello's mouth, L clamped his pale hand of the blonde's lips.

"Mmm! Mmm!" Mello protested, trying to pull off his father's hand.

"No profanity, Mello." L said firmly. "I have asked you plenty of times not to use that kind of language. Does Light let you use such words so freely?"

Mello's only reply was a heated glare.

"That is what I thought," L confirmed, releasing Mello's mouth. "You are here to enjoy yourself. Don't spend it chasing after children."

"Tell that to Matt," Mello muttered. "He's been flagging people down ever since we got here to bet them at his stupid video games."

L mentally sighed. That's just what he had feared. "Where is he exactly?"

Mello pointed lazily over to the park pavilion in the distance. There was a small crowd of children crowded around a picnic table, staring at certain redhead who sat on top. Matt looked like he was highly concentrated on whatever game he was playing as the children held out their own consoles in challenge.

"He's a monster," Mello said, shaking his head. "But it is a good idea. He's made a good profit so far. Maybe I should do something like that. What do you think, Dad?"

"I would advise against it," L said blankly. Having two sons betting other children for money doesn't seem like a walk in the park to him.

Mello snorted. "Whatever. Well, I'm gonna run. Catch you later."

"Try not to harm other children," L said as his son turned and ran the opposite direction.

Mello looked over his shoulder, his eyes gleaming in excitement. "As long as they don't touch me first! Or insult me!"

"Control, Mello." L mumbled probably too low for Mello to hear before turning towards the pavilion.

Even from there he could hear the chorus of disapproving groans ripple through the crowd of children as some of them pulled dollar bills out of their pockets to give to his redheaded son.

As he approached, he could plainly see the wide grin fixed on his face. "That's it, keep it comin'…" His gazed raked over the crowed before he pointed accusingly at one blonde boy that looked older than him. "Hey you, I know you bet me twenty bucks I couldn't beat that level in five minutes. Cough it up."

L blinked as he came to a halt behind the other children. He eyed the small pile of money beside him, which looked to be around a hundred dollars at least. This was worse than he thought. "Matt?"

Matt's expression was confused until his eyes fell on the raven-haired detective. "Oh, hey Dad! Came to make a bet?"

"About these… 'bets', Matt." L started, biting down on his thumb nail. "It could technically count as stealing. You know your skills are above average."

"But they don't know that!" Matt protested, before hastily saying to the crowd, "I'm really bad at Zelda. Just a hint, since I'm practically robbing you all and I want a challenge."

L sighed. "Matt, that is a lie. Zelda is the game you are most successful at. You own every copy of every version in three different languages."

Several kids let out noises of surprise when they heard this.

"You can read Japanese?" one of them asked curiously.

"Hai." Matt answered, an egotistical grin on his face.

"What'd he say?" one of the kids murmured to another.

The child shrugged. "I think it's yes in Japanese, my sister watches anime…"

"Awesome…!"

L mentally slapped himself. Instead of drawing attention away from the crowd, they were now fixed on Matt way more than before. "Yes, he is bilingual… Now about the bets…"

"Bi-what?"

Right. They were average in intelligence, they wouldn't know what that meant. He was about to explain, when Matt beat him to it.

"It means I can speak different languages." the redhead stated proudly. "My father is from Japan, so he's fluent in it."

A collection of 'wows' rippled through the crowd. No wonder Matt gets money so quickly, these children believe anything they hear. They aren't the brightest ones either.

"So you're Japanese too?" a child asked. "You don't look it."

Matt waved his hand dismissively. "Nah, I'm adopted. But I don't mind."

"You don't know your real parents?" one of them gasped.

Matt shrugged. "They didn't want to know me. Either that, or they died. I never found out which one. Now moving on… Next bet?"

L was about to protest when he felt a timid tug on his sleeve. He looked down, confirming it was indeed Near. He looked a bit distressed, but L could never tell with him. He was as good as keeping his emotions hidden as he was, if not better. "Something wrong, Near?"

"Mello buried my toy in the sand box and now I can't find it…" he said quietly, twirling a white lock of curly hair. "Is Matt betting again?"

"Buried your toy? I just told him to behave," L sighed. Does Mello ever listen? "And yes, unfortunately so."

Near smirked before turning to face Matt. What he said next is something L found out of character for Near. "I would like to bet you, Matt."

Matt squinted in confusion at the crowd. "That you, Near? You know you can't beat me, but go ahead."

Near pulled out a small chess set that her head tucked away under his shirt. He has the tendency to put things there, and L wondered how he didn't lose anything. "I bet, for all of your earnings, that I can beat you in chess."

"Chess?" Matt's eyes flickered in worry and confusion.

Near's smirk grew slightly. "Something wrong, Matt? You never made it video games only, did you?"

Matt gulped down his uneasiness, giving Near a determined glare. "You're on. Get up here."

L nearly wanted to cry. Near was getting involved in all of this too? The albino boy pushed through the crowd to join Matt at the picnic table.

"And if I win, I get to burn that creepy finger puppet you made of me," Matt told him. "It looks nothing like me."

"Fair enough," Near moved his pawn on the chess board. "Your turn…"

"I got my money on Matt!"

_Oh no… That voice… _Mello was standing right beside him, a monster figurine that had sand trickling out of it in his grasp. It must have been Near's toy.

"You will return that go him," L said sternly, his gaze fixed on Matt and Near as they rapidly played through a chess game.

Mello scoffed. "I wasn't planning on keeping his creepy doll. Just experiment with it.

"You will return it." L repeated, returning his gaze to his two sons.

"Stale mate…" Near mumbled as he began putting the chess pieces back on the board. "New game."

Mello plopped himself on the ground beside L. "This is gonna take a while, Dad. Near's good at chess and Matt's good at pretty much any game."

"I know," L replied blankly. "But we're on a tight schedule. We still have to pick up dinner from the grocery store."

"Hurray." Mello muttered and pulled out a chocolate bar.

"State mate," L heard again. "New game."

"Whoa…" several children chorused as they watched Near and Matt.

"They sure are fast," L commented as he bit his thumb nail. Matt's and Near's hands were moving like lightning across the board, pieces getting knocked out left and right. "Almost as fast as Light and I…"

"You guys are faster than the speed of Light," Mello said, annoyance backing his tone. He unwrapped a chocolate bar he had pulled from his jacket in one swift move. "I've got to say though, Dad. You're lasting longer in this bet than I thought you would. Daddy probably wouldn't even recognize you."

L didn't reply. It's true- he was doing exceptionally well. Of course, he never planned on losing from the start. But he also would have never had the idea that caring for his sons was so difficult. If his patience wasn't as strong as it was then he would have lost his sanity at Mello's breakdown at the doctor's office.

"Stale mate," Near announced again. "New game."

"That's three games already," Mello stated, his arm folded behind his head as he laid in the grass. He brought the chocolate up to his mouth to bite off a chunk. "I was right, this will take a while. They'll be at each other's throats by the end of this."

* * *

><p><em>65 games later...<em>

"That is an illegal move, Matt," Near stated jadedly.

L had joined Mello, who had been kind enough to share his chocolate, on the ground. Mello was pulling grass out of the ground and making a pile on his stomach, yawning every now and then. Most of the crowd have left by now, only a few curious children remaining. "They've been at this for _an hour_." Mello complained. "I want dinner."

L was about to open his mouth to reply, when Matt interrupted him.

"Not illegal, it's just never been used before," Matt countered.

"Because it's illegal. Just accept it- we're at check mate. I won."

L raised an nonexistent eyebrow, raising his gaze from the pile of grass on Mello's stomach to the two boys playing chess. Matt's mouth was gaped. "I've never lost a game before! Never!"

"Never lost a _video game_," Near corrected, smirking and twirling his white hair. "You just aren't good at board games. Now, I think my prize is all of your earnings...?"

"No way!" Matt shrieked, covering his pile of money like it's his child. "I earned all of this. Myself."

"And I just earned all of that myself," Near replied calmly. "You were too arrogant, Matt... Now quit being a sore loser and give me my reward?"

"...How about half?"

"No, all."

"Dad!" Matt whined, turning his desperate gaze to his father. "He can't take all of my money!"

"I believe he is in the right position to do so. You lost, Matt," L said carefully. "What were you planning on buying with that? You nearly have every video game in existence."

"That's the key word. Nearly." Matt protested. "I need more video games. I beat three a day, after all."

"I don't give a damn!" Mello shouted randomly, throwing the pile of hair into the air. Several blades landed on his face, but he didn't seem to mind. "I want _dinner. _Matt, cough up your money. Near, quit being yourself. Dad, get your ass in the car and drive us to the store before I do it myself."

"You cannot drive," L said, giving him a sharp glance.

Mello snorted. "Better than you. Hurry up!"

"Near, Matt..." L looked at them with expectant black orbs.

Matt frowned before shoving the pile over to him. "Take it, you cheater."

"Not cheating, Matt. Winning." Near corrected with a smile.

L stood up, his bones cracking from going into a different position besides crouching. "It is time to go now. We have to buy groceries. Is everyone ready?"

"Yes." Near replied, the money he won clutched against his chest.

"Whatever..." Matt muttered.

"Yeah, I've only been saying yes for the last hour!" Mello groaned. "_Let's go._"

The day is coming to an end. They only have a small portion left on the schedule, and then L would win! And how hard could cooking be? L doesn't do it often, but he couldn't screw it up that badly. Right? "All right. Let's go then."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **There you go. Sorry for the late update again, I've been uninspired lately. I hope this was good, I did the best I can do when I'm not in the mood for writing. u_u Anyway, review if you like, as always.


	5. Store

**A/N****: **It's. Finally. Done. I can't write to save my life lately. At least when it comes to this story. I realized it had been over ten days since I last updated. Sorry, but hey, at least I updated... :D

Anyway, enjoy this chapter~

* * *

><p>L was relieved when he finally got the black SUV parked in the superstore's parking lot. Matt and Near had an argument the whole ride to there over statistics, probabilities of winning, and that Near winning was just a stroke of good luck and that it meant nothing. Near seemed to have the upper hand in the logic, considering Matt was just fueled by his denial of his defeat. Nonetheless, it annoyed L and Mello to no end.<p>

"There was always a high chance of I winning the chess game, considering I play myself in chess all the time," Near stated as he opened the back door and stepped out.

Matt crawled out after him, scowling. He was in such a bad mood that he wasn't playing any sort of video game. _It must have really hurt his pride_, L decided. "I never play chess and I tied with you for sixty-seven games. That means it was merely a coincidence you managed to beat me!"

Mello slammed his door with all of his might as he jumped out of the car, landing on the ground with a thud. "You guys have been arguing this for thirty minutes," he groaned as he walked around the car to meet his siblings on the other side. "So Matt, quit bitching and play some violent shooting game and pretend you're shooting the guts out of Near. Trust me, it works."

"How immature," Near said blankly, looking up and twirling a white lock of hair in his fingertips.

His comment was ignored as Matt's face lit up. "Hey, that's not a bad idea! Although it doesn't compare to the real thing…"

"Save it for another day, Matt," Mello whispered, glancing warily up at L who was listening to the conversation quietly, a blank expression on his face. "When _he _isn't around to witness it."

"There will be no murders occurring in our household," L deadpanned. "You forget that I'm the world's greatest detective. I have never met a case that I couldn't solve."

Mello grinned widely up at L. "But we're geniuses. You said it yourself."

"I am a bigger genius," was L's only reply before he started towards the front entrance.

L's choice of store was a supermarket the family shopped at regularly. It had everything from toys to furniture to groceries. Normally Light was around to make sure the whole family stayed together, but today it was L's responsibility. He could already see his sons quickening their pace as they entered, bursting through the automatic doors with a mischievous grin on their faces. Except for Near, who only had a small smirk on his face.

L trudged in slower after them, gripping a shopping cart as he walked past and pulling it behind him without stopping. Mello and Matt were whispering to each other excitedly, bouncing slightly as they exchanged ideas. Near was only listening on the side with an eyebrow raised in interest. L didn't want to know what they were discussing. "What do you want to get for supper?" L asked as he came to a halt beside his sons.

Mello tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Hmm… Brownies?"

"No," L replied. "Light would lecture me before giving me the silent treatment for a whole week."

"So?" Mello scoffed, brushing his blonde hair out of his face.

"So, Light's lectures are headache-inducing. I do not like pain," L deadpanned. "Any other suggestions? Please keep them simple, as I have little cooking abilities."

"You have _no _cooking abilities," Mello corrected. "Any pancake you prepared this morning was either burnt or _on fire._"

L blinked. "They were edible nonetheless. Now cooking suggestions?"

"Spaghetti?" Matt suggested as he pulled out his PSP. It appeared he was calming down a bit.

"…How does one prepare spaghetti?" L asked, looking at the redhead.

Matt rolled his eyes. "Dad, spaghetti is one of the easiest dinners to prepare. If you can't do it, I've taken a cooking class before."

"You are only eight," L pointed on as he nipped softly as the skin above his thumbnail.

"Eight and a better cook than you," Matt countered, giving L a mocking smirk as he looked up at him.

Mello nodded at this. "It's true, Dad. He's way better than you."

"Now is not the time to be insulting my cooking abilities," L said in a low tone, his gaze switching between Mello and Matt.

Matt didn't look up from his video game. "You mean your _nonexistent_ cooking abilities?"

"So spaghetti then?" L said stiffly, causing all three of his sons to laugh.

"Relax, Dad. I'm just joking," Matt chuckled, grinning widely. "But your cooking skills could use some work."

"Later, Matt," was L's only reply as he started towards the aisle with the pasta. Mello climbed into the cart as L was pushing it, crossing on leg over each other and leaning back with an arm folded behind his head. In his hand was a chocolate bar with a single chunk bitten out of it, which he added to by biting out another. _Crack! _L sometimes thought his son did that on purpose.

Near crawled under the cart and into the space where you put packages of bottle water or soda. He was lying on his stomach with his figure clutched tightly under him.

Matt clung onto the side of the cart with one hand as he played his PSP with another. Did Light let them do this…? It's been a while since they had all been grocery shopping together, so he couldn't remember.

L blinked down once at his sons before returning his attention to the rows of aisles, trying to locate the one with pasta. After a moment, Mello groaned and pointed upwards, "Aisle seven, Dad. Behind you."

L looked over his shoulder and followed Mello's gaze. He found his son was right and was slightly frustrated that he found the aisle before L did. He is childish and hates losing, after all.

Without a comment or word of thanks from L, he spun the cart around with slight difficulty considering all the extra weight he's pushing now. There they retrieved the spaghetti noodles and sauce, since they had conveniently put them in the same aisle. Mello raised an eyebrow at the items in the cart before leaning forwards and cupping his hand around Matt's ear and whispering something to him. Matt's facial expression didn't change the entire time, his gaze returning to his game when Mello withdrew.

"Hey, Dad…" Matt started when L went to turn the cart.

L halted his actions. "What is it, Matt?"

"Can we have meat with our spaghetti?" he asked, a sincere smile on his face. "We all like to eat it that way." The other two children gave him a nod of confirmation.

L was immediately suspicious, but didn't let his show as he replied, "I see no harm in cooking it that way. Where is the meat aisle?"

Matt pointed to the end of the aisle they were in where various meats were displayed in refrigerating machines. "We're gonna need hamburger meat."

While Matt was talking to L, Mello had crawled back out of the cart, leaning against it with an 'I don't care' attitude on his face as he bit another chunk out of his chocolate bar. Matt then bent down to whisper in Near's ear who also crawled out of his spot afterwards.

L raised an eyebrow at his sons who were just standing there staring at him. Something was suspicious. "Do you three want to walk now?"

"Yeah," Mello groaned for them. "Let's go get the hamburger meat, I _starving!"_

"I am also having strong feeling of hunger," Near added in tonelessly as he twirled his hair.

Mello scowled. "Don't agree with me!"

Matt smirked down at his game. "'Hey Mello, quit bitching and play some violent shooting game and pretend you're shooting the guts out of Near. Trust me, it works.'"

Mello's stare turned dangerous. "I'll bitch all I please, Matt. And if I'm shooting the guts out of Near, it's not going to be in some video game."

A woman nearby gave Mello and incredulous look before looking at L and frowning in disapproval. L returned the stare blankly until the woman got uncomfortable and walked away. He blinked, returning his gaze to his sons. "No talking of homicide in public."

"Or private," Near muttered, his eyes flickering with irritancy. "Jail would be an unfortunate place to go when you have such potential, don't you agree?"

Mello scoffed. "Please, you aren't worth jail time."

"_Moving on,_" Matt butted in loudly. "Let's not forget _what we're here for._"

Mello and Near blinked in unison. "Oh yeah, the _hamburger meat…_"

L blinked as well, his suspicions and confusion growing. "Yes… Let's go retrieve it. We are running a bit behind schedule."

"We wouldn't want that, would we?" Matt smiled innocently at L.

L narrowed his eyes. "No…"

Matt grabbed the cart and began pushing it down the aisle, Near and Mello on both sides of him. "Let's go then!" he tossed behind him.

L shoved his hands in his pockets and followed behind them in a hunched position, keeping his eyes glued on them the entire time. He got a few wary stares, as if they thought he had recently escaped from a mental institution. He was used to it, so he made them no attention.

Matt stopped pushing the cart, glancing around in confusion. After a moment, he scratched his red hair and looked over his shoulder at L. "I don't see the hamburger meat. Do you think you could find it?"

L bit on his thumb nail as his suspicions grew. _Sixty percent chance they're going to attempt something foolish behind my back… _"How come you cannot look for it yourself? You have the cart after all."

Matt scratched his head sheepishly. "I was just getting to that… I have to use the restroom. So I won't be able to."

"And to ensure safety, we're going to use the buddy system. So Mello and I will be accompanying him," Near added in.

L raised an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

Matt nodded first followed by the blonde and the albino.

L blinked before fishing around in his pockets. A moment later he pulled out two pairs of handcuffs, holding them up with an index finger and a thumb.

Mello blinked in surprise. "Why the fuck do you carry handcuffs with you? Do you and Daddy like bondage that much?"

L blushed slightly in embarrassment, as this was one of the reasons. He hoped it wasn't noticeable. "No, I simply have them for law enforcement purposes. Now, if you're going to do the buddy system, we will execute it properly. Come over here."

All three boys exchanged glances before walking up to L.

"Hold out your wrists," L instructed.

After a moment of hesitation, they did as instructed. L grabbed Mello's wrist, who was left of Matt, and cuffed him to the redhead. Then, he took Near's wrist, who was to the right of Matt, and handcuffed him to Matt. They were now all joined together. Near and Matt stared down at it for a moment with a blank expression while Mello scowled. "The hell? Do you want us to look like prisoners?"

"This ensures you will not get lost," L said, a ghost of a smile gracing his features. It was a mocking one that angered Mello to no end. "That was your goal, correct?"

"Cute," Mello muttered. "Real fucking cute. I'll get you back for this."

Matt raised both of his wrists, which both had cuffs on them. The chains forced both Mello's and Near's hands to raise as well. "How do you expect me to use the restroom with the cuffs on my wrists?"

L shrugged. "Use your imagination. You have five minutes and counting…"

"Five-" Matt started to protest.

"Four minutes and fifty-six seconds and counting…" L interrupted, as if he had a stopwatch embedded into his brain.

"Let's go." Mello then took off running, the chains forcing Near and Matt to stumble and run after him.

"Mello," Matt puffed as he tried to match Mello's pace. "What's the… plan… now?"

"Same as before, except now we have chains on our wrists," Mello replied, shrugging. "Plus, there's always a way to get out of some handcuffs. Observe, Mattie."

Mello made a right turn into the beauty aisle, stopping at a container of bobby pins. He picked one up and bent it a bit before proceeding to pick the locks with it. After a moment… _Click! …. Click! _Mello dropped the disfigured bobby pin on the ground and held the handcuffs out in front of him, a victorious grin on his face. "There."

"I am ashamed to be a part of this," Near mused, rubbing his wrist where the handcuff had been.

Mello snorted as he shoved the handcuffs into his jacket. "Too late to back out now, so suck it up."

"I hope they have the new Zelda game…" Matt said dreamily as he also rubbed his wrists.

"And that new Transformer. It is supposed to be very complicated and difficult to transform," Near added in with a slightly excited tone, an uncharacteristic trait for the white-haired boy.

"And I'm gonna get as much chocolate that can fit down my pants," Mello finished with a gleeful smile on his face. "But that comes last. First things first…"

Mello grabbed Near's and Matt's wrists and dragged them out of the aisle before making another right turn into the art aisle. He stopped abruptly in the middle and scooped up three cans of spray paint. He tossed a red one to Matt, a blue one to Near, and kept the green for himself. "…Let's get down to business."

"We are never going to see daylight again," Near remarked, shaking his can.

Matt nodded. "That's true. But we're never gonna have an opportunity like this again. When Daddy's not here, _anything _is possible."

Mello cracked into a smirk. "And we could effect their little 'bet'."

"Also a priority," Matt agreed, nodding.

"Well then," Near started, popping the top of his spray paint off. "…shall we get started?"

Mello snorted. "The sheep is wanting to commit the crime the most. Go figure," He glanced over at Matt, grinning. "You ready?"

Matt slipped his goggles down over his eyes, holding his can out in front of him in a battle-like stance. "I've _been _ready."

Mello's eyes turned dangerous, making the smile that was on his face seem psychotic. "Let's go then."

* * *

><p>L drummed his fingers against the handle of the shopping cart, counting down the seconds in his head. <em>It has been twelve minutes now… My deduction was correct. They were up to something. <em>Abandoning the cart, L set out to find this three sons who are probably creating a three ring circus at this point. 

_Please don't do anything that could be a felony charge… _He silently pleaded as he stalked through the store, craning his neck every angle in hopes of finding his sons. _They're all chained together, so- _L stopped his thoughts as he found his first piece of evidence. Nailed to the wall of the store was the handcuffs L had used to join the three. Below it was messages written in three different colors of spray paint.

_You lost the game, Dad. -Near_

_Bitch, please. Like I haven't figured out how to get out of __handcuffs.__ -Mello_

_We're so dead, right? Oh well, look at the bright side… There isn't one! :D -Matt _

L swallowed down his fear. _This _is what he was afraid of. This is the kind of thing he was hoping his sons would _not _pull. Some crazy move like this that would not only land them in juvey, but get Light and him a hefty fine for destruction of property. And considering those weren't their nails or spray paint, a fine for theft as well. Matt was right: They are _so _dead.

A beep echoed through the store as the intercom was turned on. "Good evening, bitches, and welcome to Mello's store," Oh God… That can't be who L thinks it is. He shut his eyes, hoping it was all just a dream. "I have a little secret to share with you. You are all my bitches. Dad, that means you." _Click! _

The entire store was silent for a moment before voices were heard again in a low murmur. L was still frozen in place, staring owlishly at seemingly nothing until he blinked. "This is not good… I have to find them…"

"Four!" Matt's voice echoed through the store as a golf ball was sent flying from somewhere on the other side.

…_Golf? _"Hey! You kids!" an employee was heard, their voice distant. "Get back here… Hey!"

L listened for more voices as he continued his search for his juvenile sons. As he passed through the candy aisle, another clue surfaces. Nailed to wall in the aisle was a chocolate bar. Written under it was a message in green:

_Roses are red,_

_Violets are blue,_

_I'm not going to get diabetes,_

_So screw you. _

_Like it? Wrote it myself._

_-Mello. _

L groaned quietly in frustration as he read Mello's poem. If Mello wrote a message in the candy aisle, then there was most likely a message from Matt in the electronics aisle and one from Near in the toy aisle. And after reading Mello's _beautiful _work of art, L's not too sure he wants to see them.

L noticed that the electronics area was only a few aisles down, so he reluctantly let curiosity takes the best of him. Games and other electronical devices lined the aisles of electronics.

A huge collection of Tvs were all set to the same channel and moved at the exact same time in the back in front of rows of albums. Everything seemed fine, until you noticed the gap in the collection of Tvs. L sighed and made his way over to it. He was welcomed with a sight as bad as Mello's. There wasn't anything nailed to the wall this time, but a message written to him specifically:

_Here's a story._

_Once upon a time, my dad trusted me._

_Then I set that trust to flames and killed it. Mario-style._

_Oops._

_-Matt _

Why oh why did his sons want to make his life a living hell? Right when he's so close to winning. It had to be _at least _a quarter past six now. They're _way _behind schedule. Deciding that he had spent enough time reading Matt's true story (They had killed his trust. Stomped all over it.), L began walking randomly in a different direction. In a way, he wants to see what Near left for him. He was always so calm and innocent-seeming. Yet you know what they say about the quiet ones…

_Beep! _The intercom turned on again and L was preparing for the worst. "Attention, all shoppers," the angry voice of an adult man came over the speakers. "If you own a redheaded child, a white-haired child, and a blonde child please gather them up and leave the store immediately. Thank you." _Click!_

L could tell the 'Thank you' was artificial. But he doesn't blame him. Out of all of their team-stunts in the past, this one takes the cake. Mmm, cake… L almost turned towards the bakery, which was in eyesight, but he let willpower take over and forced himself away from it.

"Hell yeah, bitches!" A blur sped past in front of him, Mello's voice ringing in his ears.

L thought he made out Mello and Near sitting in a cart with Matt pushing them, but L was hoping he was seeing things. Or at least hearing things. But as soon as they had passed, they were gone, and L had no intentions on chasing them down. He would capture them in an easier way.

L looked back up and noticed he was right in front of the toy aisle. He moved through the aisles of toys before finally finding his clue in the back. _Near… I had faith in you… _A transformer was nailed to the wall with a message in blue writing directly below it.

_Dear Dad,_

_Much like a transformer,_

_We are more than meets the eye. _

_-Near _

L didn't get it. It must be inside-joke or some saying that is associated with his toys. But he did understand the 'more than meets the eye' part. That they were. Right as he finished reading the message, a loud crash was heard in the direction the cart was going.

"You'll never catch us alive!" L heard Matt roar before hearing yet another crash. "Ow!"

"I've got ya, Matt!"

…

"…Never mind, they got me too."

"Damn it!"

L followed the voices closely, a wave of success flowing through him as he heard them get louder and louder with each step: meaning he was approaching.

"I knew this was a terrible idea. Now we go to juvenile court."

"Always thinking the positive things, Near."

_So close… _L made one more right turn before coming face-to-face to his three sons who were all restricted by the employees, who had red, blue, and green spots all over their uniforms.

Mello was still fighting, writhing and biting out at random. Near just sat there, staring down at the floor with a defeated look on his face. Matt was panting slightly, as if he tried fighting but quickly gave up. Several cans and boxes were scattered all over the floor as well as a cart knocked over on its side. A few spots of it was dent in from the impact. L dragged his gaze back to his sons. "…Are you satisfied with yourselves?"

"Very much so," Mello confirmed, smirking.

His other two sons didn't reply, keeping their gazes on the floor, unhappy with being defeated so early.

An employee raised an eyebrow at him with interest. "Are you their father?"

L gave a small nod of confirmation. "I shall deal with them properly."

"We would just like you to know that we searched them and we found items concealed in all of their clothing," an employee said flatly before releasing Matt. "The blonde was trying to smuggle chocolate, the redhead had a video game shoved down his pants, and the white-haired one was holding a toy under his shirt."

Stealing? What has his sons resorted to? Perhaps it was just the thrill of trying to be successful with said actions, but L would expect this sort of actions with a teenager, not a child. They were growing and maturing all too fast, L decided.

"And you'll have to pay for the damages," the one restraining Near added in before releasing him.

The one hold Mello didn't comment, but gave L an extremely disapproving look.

L raked his gaze over his sons again. "Not a word out of each of you until we leave this store. We will go and pick out our dinner-"

"Erm… No, sir. I'm afraid you're being removed from the store," an employee said awkwardly. "We can't risk this again."

Just what he had feared. After another sharp look at all of his sons, he replied. "That is fine. I completely understand your reasoning behind this," The employees nodded before dispersing to return to their duties, warning that if they're seen anywhere in the store again, they are immediately arrested. L's voice lowered darkly as he said, "Mello, Matt, Near, follow me."

There was an awkward silence as L led them out of the store quickly. Matt broke it as they reached the SUV, "Um… What about dinner?" he asked in a squeaky, nervous voice.

"Takeout," L answered simply, starting the car. After more silence, he spoke again, "It is not me that you should fear. It is your father, rather, when he finds out."

A small period of silence, before Mello said quietly, "Yeah… We're dead."

"But it was so much fun!" Matt cheered loudly in the middle of the uncomfortable silence. "Like riding in the cart… and playing golf…"

"Matt!" Near and Mello exclaimed in unison.

Matt sulked into the leather seats. "Sorry…"

* * *

><p>L seemed satisfied with himself as they pulled into the driveway. They had ordered a pizza delivery which would arrive to their house shortly, so he doesn't have to risk burning down the house. He didn't break during the store episode or any of the other troubles of the day, so technically he felt he had already defeated his husband. As always, he noted arrogantly to himself.<p>

L led his sons and him up to the house, fishing in his pocket for the house keys. He pulled them out and brought them up to the door to unlock it, when he realized there's something he had forgotten. One key detail. Something that could mean the difference between winning and losing unless his memory succeeds him.

"Something wrong, Dad?" Mello inquired, but L ignored him.

L sighed inaudibly as he searched his memory. _How can I forget this of all things? _

* * *

><p><strong>AN: ** I had actually thought this would be the last chapter, then this one got too long so I had to end it. The next chapter will be the last one, and will probably be very short compared to the others. Ah well. Anyways, reviews are nice thing to read. If you leave one, I might get motivated to write quicker. They say praise encourages people to do better: that goes hand in hand with this. Not begging, but you know. Let me know you liked it._  
><em>


	6. A Winner

**A/N: **Final chapter! I know, I know. Like, two weeks, right? Or more? Let me explain. We're nearing our end of course exams within a month or so, and my teachers have been cramming us with reviews. I also have to memorize the balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet, work on a biome project for Biology- I've been busy. u_u Last weekend I was at an anime convention the entire time. Which was amazing, I got tons of Death Note merchandise. ;u;

Anyway, yeah, that's my excuse for taking so long. Don't like it? Sorry, but it's the truth. At least the chapter's here now. So, enjoy it~

* * *

><p>L closed his eyes briefly in frustration. Out of all the things to forget, forgetting <em>the code to the security system of the house<em> had to be the worst. L wass not normally forgetful, but he honestly could not remember the last time he entered the passcode himself. When he actually left their home, normally it was Light or Watari who punched in the code. Not L.

If he just barged in and ignored the security, obviously bad things would happen. Like the police showing up at their house and arresting the great detective L for "breaking and entering". Oh wouldn't Light have a field day with that one.

Biting his lip, L tried to search his mind for possible solutions. Their security system wasn't hackable, considering L had the most secure systems installed in the house. It was necessary after all- he was L and any good father/husband would want their home to feel safe at all times. Any tampering to the security immediately sends a distress signal to Light's cell phone, so that's out of the question too. Every possible option just seemed impossible thanks to the safety of their security system. This time, L's cautious behavior posed as a problem. It looked like his hope lied on the _angels _that is his sons.

He was brought back to reality with a firm yank on his sleeve. L glanced down over his shoulder, making eye contact with an impatient-looking Mello. "Dad, what's taking so long? Just open the door, you have the key!"

"…There appears to be a bigger complication than that, Mello," L replied in a low tone.

Mello's eyes flashed with irritation. "Complication? Like what?"

"Well…" L started, looking back at the door. "…I seem to have forgotten the security code to our house. Do you know it?"

The blonde gave him a long stare. "Are you fucking kidding me? You forgot the _security code _to our _house? _The code to the security system _you _installed?"

"It has been quite a while since I've had to use the code myself. Don't blame me for forgetting it," L said defensively. "Do you know the code or not, Mello?"

Mello rolled his eyes. "Why would I know that?"

"Anyone else?" L said dryly, gazing at his other sons.

Near was solving a rubix cube he had been carrying in his pocket. It was solved by the time L had finished speaking. Near gave it a bored stare before putting it back into his pocket. "I can not say I know it, sorry."

L was starting to get a sinking feeling. Near was the one he was relying on; his memory is normally as good as L's. Matt was the most forgetful of the three, but he might as well give it a shot. "Matt?"

The redhead's fingers were dancing across his PSP, his gaze burning intently into the screen. He didn't seem to hear L as he continued to play, letting out a joyful cry a moment later and jumping into the air. "Yeah, high score!"

Mello, Near, and L all stared at him with the same blank look. Matt blinked. "What?"

"The security code, Matt," L reminded him. "Do you know it?"

Matt looked up thoughtfully for a moment before bringing his gaze slowly back down to L. "…The security code for what?"

Mello smacked his forehead in exasperation while Near just twirled his hair. "Typical Matt…"

Matt frowned. "Hey, I was playing a video game! I can't pay attention to your conversation a play at the same time."

"That's the reason why you were in third at Whammy's." Near teased in the same monotone he always talks in.

Matt crossed his arms. "There's no reason to bring Whammy's into this."

"There's no reason _not_ to bring Whammy's into this," Mello butted in, grinning. "Remember that picture Roger took of us when we were little? We had a competition over who could build the highest tower out of blocks, and I won."

"You mean you beat Matt, then I beat you," Near corrected while twirling his hair.

Mello waved his hand in dismissal. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. Matt still came in last."

"Some score doesn't matter to me. It's not like I'm succeeding L… err, Dad anyway," Matt said, shrugging. "It's you and Near who fight over being in first all the time, not me."

Mello clenched his fists. "And just you watch, Near. When we send the tests to Whammy's again this year for placing, I guarantee that I'll win."

"You said that last year and I beat you," Near said with the ghost of a smirk on his face. "When will you actually follow through with your words?"

"Why you…" Mello lunged at Near with his hands out in front of him to tackle him to the ground when Matt grabbed him. Mello thrashed in his grasp. "Damn it, Matt!"

L watched them blankly before deciding to intervene. "If I remember correctly, I asked a question."

They all froze and exchanged glances before Matt let go of Mello. Matt coughed and looked up innocently at L. "So… what was the question again?"

L sighed. "I'm not sure why I am bothering asking this but… Do you know the security code for the house?"

Matt really looked like he was trying to remember the way he looked up thoughtfully, his brow furrowed in frustration. Finally, he sighed in defeat, slouching a bit. "No, I don't. Sorry."

"Shocker," Mello said, his tone dripping with sarcasm as he unwrapped a chocolate bar.

Matt scowled before knocking the bar of chocolate out of Mello's hand in one smack, causing it break into many separate pieces as it hit the ground. Mello's eyes widened in horror for a moment before he turned on Matt, clutching his shirt and yanking him towards his face. "What did you do that for?"

Matt smirked as Mello held him up to his face. "I share Daddy's concern for you getting diabetes. Just looking out for you, Mells."

Mello tightened his grip on Matt's shirt, returning the smirk. "Oh, but Mattie, you just destroyed my chocolate bar. My health should be the least of your worries."

Matt scoffed. "Like a nine-year-old with shoulder-length hair in tight leather is a threat to me."

Mello narrowed his eyes. "Oh, that tears it."

The end of the day is when the children are notorious for getting into arguments. They're stressed out and tired from the long day, and just the smallest thing can set them off. L noticed that Mello had raised a fist, so he decided to break the two up before Matt got a black eye or a bloody nose. He pushed both of them apart. "Mello and Matt, violence is no way to resolve things."

Mello huffed, causing the blonde strands that were hanging in his face to fly up before falling back down in an even messier fashion. "Yeah, yeah. How are we getting into the house?"

"We have to find out the security code of course." L made it sound like that was an easy thing. Unfortunately, unless there was an alternate option, Light was the only one who knew the code. And while the cost of losing wasn't something L was fond with, just the act of losing seems unbearable. Light and L are very competitive, and L doesn't know if he could stand losing to his husband. Light makes losing much worse than it should be.

"Well, Daddy knows the code by heart- oh wait you're doing that stupid bet with him." Mello rolled his eyes. "Just get over it, okay? I have to take a shower and I want to eat my dinner _inside._"

"And you will," L muttered. "I just need to figure out an alternate option…"

Mello smacked his forehead again. "There is no other option, damn it! It's like you have the military protecting our house- you can't get past it."

"I'm aware," L sighed, his raven hair falling into his eyes. He was quite frustrated, and while it might not show in his voice, you could clearly see it in his eyes. "I'm certain there is a way to get through it, we just need to figure it out."

"The slightest tampering with the security unit immediately sends a text message to Daddy's phone," Near reminded him. "Daddy would come home immediately because he'd think someone broke in, then kill you for making him worry for no reason. If the police does not beat him here, that is."

"Jail or sex. _Please _tell me the choice is obvious or I'll be very worried," Mello added in, crossing his arms.

L blinked down at his son. "There is not a bet, therefore there is nothing involving sex."

"There's no bet? Great!" Matt said with a grin. "Then calling Daddy shouldn't be a problem, right?"

"…" L refused to respond. With no where or no one to turn to, the only option is becoming painfully obvious. It was four hours until Light was due to return, and although he is perfectly fine with sitting outside for that amount of time, his sons with give him hell if he attempted it.

"_Right?_" Mello pressed, his face twisting into a smirk.

"Calling your father would be rude. He wouldn't interrupt me on my day off, so I will do the same."

Mello let out a groan in annoyance. "Dad. He wouldn't care. I'm pretty sure he'd prefer us inside our house over getting interrupted for a minute."

"I refuse to call him," L said firmly. "As I said before, we will find an alternate option." He paused for a moment before getting a genius idea. "…Although, Light might not be as angry if one of you called him. You are practically his life, you know."

Mello raised an eyebrow. "Oh? You can't interrupt Daddy, but we can?"

"He would take it lighter if it was one of you," L repeated. "Or, we could sit out here until I formulate a plan."

Matt let out a huff before thrusting his hand into his pocket, fishing around for something. "Here, lemme call him…"

L blinked. "Don't you need my cell phone?"

Matt pulled out a silver flip-phone and grinned. "Nah, I've got my own."

"How long have you had that?" L questioned.

Matt opened it and punched in Light's number. "A month or so. You aren't very observant, are you?"

"You've never pulled it out in front of me," L pointed out.

Matt held the phone up to his ear. "For obvious reasons- hello? Yeah, Daddy, this is Matt. …No, this is my cell phone… About a month… Well, I was going to tell you… Yeah, yeah. Listen, do you know the security code to the house? …Is Dad around? Yeah, he's standing right here." L gulped. "…You want to talk to him? …Okay, hold on."

Matt pulled the phone away from his ear and held it out towards L, smirking. "It's for you."

L gave Matt a blank stare before snatching the phone out of his grasp with two fingers, holding it up to his ear as if the phone had a disease. "Yes?"

"Putting your son up to calling me instead of yourself. That's a pretty low blow," Light's voice came through the phone.

"I did not put him up to it. It was completely his decision."

"I don't believe you. I win."

"Light, it never said anywhere in your guidelines that our sons couldn't call you."

Mello's face cracked into a victorious grin. "Guidelines? To a bet? Ha, I knew it! I win!" It seems that he purposely said it loud enough for Light to hear.

"…And now our sons know about the bet. Another point towards your defeat, L."

"Not fair, Light. I propose we end this in a draw."

"I propose we don't. No sex for you, L."

L pouted. "But Light…"

"No buts," a triumphant Light replied. "I'm coming home now. Oh, and by the way- the security code is 1590." _Click! _

Mello was still grinning. "So?"

"1590," L muttered before turning around and unlocking the door.

* * *

><p><em>Later that night… <em>

* * *

><p>Light stretched out beside L on their shared silk comforter. L was still sulking slightly about his loss, but Light was in a good mood about his victory. He was also loving the fact that L couldn't touch him. He crawled on top of L and straddled his hips. "I'm surprised you lasted that long, really."<p>

L glared up at him. "Light, get off of me. This is teasing."

"I know exactly what it is," Light said with a smirk. "And there's nothing you can do about it."

"Hmm," L hummed in frustration, trying not to look up at Light who had lowered himself merely centimeters away from his face.

"You made it through the doctor, the park, the principal's office…" Light said all of this while hovering over L's lips. "But yet you couldn't remember four numbers. What a shame."

"Light…" L growled, giving his chest a shove to push him away from his face. "This teasing isn't fair, you know I can't do anything."

"That's what makes it fun," Light said, still smirking. "By the way, L… When you said eat sweets whenever and _however _you like… What did you mean?"

"It isn't something of importance now," L replied simply.

Light lowered his face back down to his husband's, much to L's annoyance. "But it is important to me. I want to know."

L sighed in defeat and annoyance. "If you insist. I wanted to make Light into a sundae."

Light blinked in surprise for a moment before his expression turned back to the devilish appearance it was before. "Oh? Is that so?"

"Yes, those were my original plans," L muttered before pushing Light away from him again. "It would have been nice."

"A sundae, huh? You pervert," Light mused before sitting up, still straddling L. "I think I might have an option that could benefit us both."

L narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "And that is?"

"I make _you _into a sundae," Light said, his eyes flashing.

L shook his head in disapproval. "That would require you to be seme. We both know I am the seme in this relationship."

"Not tonight. I won, remember?" Light reminded him. "You don't have to go abstinent, and I get to be seme. Sound okay?"

The conditions did benefit them both, and being uke couldn't possibly be the worst thing ever. It's just for one night, and he was getting frustrated with Light getting so close to him that he can't touch. It didn't take long for L to see the best solution, but he wasn't very happy with it. "Fine, those conditions are okay."

Light grinned. "Great. I'll go get the chocolate syrup and whipped cream, since that's what you were going to use on me."

L grumbled in slight frustration that he wouldn't be performing the actions, but otherwise remained silent.

* * *

><p><em>In Matt's room…<em>

* * *

><p>Mello sprawled on top of Matt's bed with the redhead at his feet. Near crouched beside the bed, playing with his robot that Light had fixed for him earlier. They had been sitting their in silence for a while, the only sound heard being Matt's video game music.<p>

Mello broke the silence. "So, did you guys expect Dad to win?"

Near shook his head as he reached for his other figure. "No, I did not. I actually expected him to break early."

"Eh, he had a small chance," Matt said absentmindedly. "But he did make it farther than my expectations."

Mello nodded in agreement. "Yeah, same here…"

"1590," Near recited randomly as he made the figures fight each other.

Mello lifted his head up to look at the albino. "The security code?" He looked confused for a second before his face twisted into a small smirk. "Wait... You aren't saying..."

"...you knew the code the whole time?" Matt finished, his face mirroring Mello's.

"Correct," Near said, finally finishing off the monster-like figure with his robot.

"Ah, you evil little bitch," Mello chuckled, resting his head back on the mattress.

Near shrugged. "Why not? We all wanted Daddy to win. Dad should have the code memorized anyway."

"True," Matt nodded in agreement, his pale face lit up by the glow of his PSP.

All three of them sat in silence for a few more moments, Mello fiddling with his rosary, Near making a dice tower, and Matt playing game after game. The blissful silence was interrupted by a sound Mello had hoped not to hear tonight.

"Ah, Light!" A pained yelp echoed through the house, immediately causing the three to tense and exchange glances.

Mello relaxed a moment later. "Looks like they both got what they wanted."

Near looked over his shoulder at him. "Which was?"

"L, be quiet, the whole neighborhood can hear you!"

Near blushed in realization. "…Oh…"

"I bet Daddy got to be on top for tonight since he won. I knew it had to do with sex," Mello said with a victorious smirk. "See, you didn't figure this out, Near. This is why I should be number one."

"Dissecting our parents' pointless bet does not mean you have a higher IQ than I," Near pointed out, pulling out a finger puppet set he had set aside. He put Mello on his index finger, Matt on his ring finger, and his own puppet on his middle so that he was above them. He held it up for Mello to see. "…I will always be number one. Only a small percent chance you will ever surpass me."

Mello shot up from the mattress, clenching his fists and giving Near a look that could kill. "Why you…-"

Matt interrupted them with a groan. "Now's not the time to start that argument again… And that finger puppet still looks _nothing like me."_

Mello also frowned at his finger puppet Near created. "I look like a girl."

"I created the puppets based off of your appearances. It is not my fault that you look feminine, Mello," Near replied.

Matt pinched the bridge of his nose, expecting the explosion from Mello before it happened. "Oh God…"

"Oh you've done it now-" Mello moved to lunge at Near, his fingers curved in a claw-like fashion, when a noise interrupted him- this one sounding more of pleasure.

The three immediately blushed, looking around Matt's room awkwardly. Mello scratched the back of his head. "…Maaaaybe we should go to sleep."

Near nodded in agreement. "Yes, that sounds like a good idea."

Mello and Near were about to open the door to Matt's bedroom when yet another sound echoed through the house. Near froze while Mello scowled and whipped around. "What, do they think we're deaf?" he snapped irritably. "Matt, we're sleeping in here. I don't even want to take the slightest chance of seeing what's going on in there."

"There's an extra blanket in the closet," Matt replied, nodding in understanding.

"Thanks, Mattie," Mello muttered as he retrieved a fluffy comforter, spreading it out on the floor. Mello laid on one side of the makeshift pallet while Near settled himself on the other. They sat in silence, being interrupted by the occasional muffled moan or yell.

"…Let's make an agreement, guys," Mello said, sighing exasperation. "Next time they have a bet- remind them of this."

"That might backfire on you, Mells," Matt commented from his bed as he continued to play his game.

Another strange noise backed his statement. Mello wanted to go down their and tell them to be a bit quieter, but he didn't want to be scarred at the same time. He squeezed his ears between two pillows in an attempt to drown out the muffled noises. "This is going to be a loooong night…"

Near and Matt mumbled their agreements.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **The end! :D Thank god I finally finished this. It's really been bugging me rfkjedssosijfr. I apologize to anyone who was bothered by the yaoi hints in this last chapter, but hey, they are married.

So. Light ended up winning. You probably could have seen that coming a mile away, but oh well. Post any opinions through a review~

**Thank you: **_TheAuWalker, lolgreeness, 7millionduckies, GodsOfDeathLikeApples, DarkAngelJudas, PAAASTAAAA, Don't Forget Hope, insideInsomnia, brightnight003, Dragon77, kay-kw33n, ConsequencesOfYaoi, beyond-the-bad-blood, and all anonymous for reviewing this story so far. If you plan on reviewing this chapter, then my thanks goes to you as well. (I will update this when I get more reviewers.)_


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